An Artist's Notebook

Blitz

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 23:27:00 +0000

I had big plans this weekend of going down to Ottumwa to help Jen and Derrick get the house in Ottumwa in shape to go on the market, but unfortunately I had a little trouble on the way to work on Friday.

That my friends, is a blown tire.

I was able to go down on Saturday and help out a bit, but unfortunately my ride for Sunday flaked on me. Oh well, here are some pictures from Saturday.

Jay

Dave

Mindi and Jen

Jen

Derrick

Derrick and Rob

Jen

Santa

It was good to see Mindi again. It had been too long.

November

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 22:06:00 +0000

November's image.

I also added about 20 pictures to the Flora Album:

Flora

I should point out that because my galleries were victimized by spam, if you decide to register as a user because:

A. You want to comment on an image.
B. You want to rate an image.
C. You want to favorite an image.
D. You like me as a human being.

I do have to approve all new registrations to keep the spammers at bay. Don't be disheartened, I'm pretty quick at approving real people for registration.

You might also notice that you are familiar with most of the images added to the Flora Album. I have finally gotten some of the classics up for your perusal. Including My Giverny and Happiness Shared #01.

November

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 22:06:00 +0000

Goodbye, Old Friend

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 01:02:00 +0000

I got word on Friday that this week will be the last week of operation for the Varsity II Theater in Ames. The Cinemark Corporation had been wanting to close the theater down for quite some time, but they were stuck in a lease. Unfortunately for fans of thoughtful, intelligent films, Cinemark was able to negotiate an early termination of their lease and will be closing down the Varsity forever on Thursday night.

This is a sad day. I know that frequently when I have attended movies at this theater there was little more than me and my companions there, but I think this theater could have made it. The Fleur Cinema in Des Moines seems to flourish showing similar movies to the Varsity and it doesn't have the built in audience of Art, Independent, Foreign and Documentary Film fans that the Varsity's close proximity to a major college campus gives them.

It never seemed like Cinemark was interested in making the Varsity work. I know from firsthand experience what it is like to run a business for a person that is doing everything they can possibly do to make that business fail. When it happened to me, it ended with a meeting where my staff and I were served burnt pretzels and burnt hot chocolate.

I hope, if nothing else, that the staff of the Varsity was given properly prepared food when their theater was lead to the chopping block.

I will remember fondly that I saw some of my all-time favorite films at the Varsity. It is the theater where I saw Once, Hustle and Flow, Born into Bro,thels, Young at Heart, Son of Rambow, Napoleon Dynamite, Fight Club, Insomnia, Akeelah and the Bee and The Queen.

Not everything I ever saw at the Varsity was great. Some movies were quite dreadful, but it was always interesting.

It might seem like losing two movie screens in Ames isn't going to reduce the amount of movie options in Ames, by much. But when you look at the type of movies that will be lost, the amount of movie options in Ames just hit an all-time low.

I will be going to the Varsity for one last time on Monday night to say goodbye to an old friend.

Intermission

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Sat, 03 Jan 2009 23:40:00 +0000

On New Year's Day, between the Outback Bowl and the Rose Bowl, I went over to check out the ACTORS building in Ames with Becky, Terra and Geri. Geri is actually the President or Chairman of ACTORS.

Some pictures.

Geri

Shoes

Becky & Terra

Rubber Chicken

Ham

Geri and I

Dressing Room

It was an interesting experience.

October

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Fri, 02 Jan 2009 22:22:00 +0000

October's picture.

Some mums.

Reading for a New Year

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Thu, 01 Jan 2009 21:13:00 +0000

It is a New Year and soon enough, it will be too cold to go outside and you will need to do more while you are inside than just watching the Cyclones play basketball. May I suggest reading. In fact, while I'm suggesting I'm going to suggest a few websites that are worth your time to read every now and again.

Teresa's blog about crafts: Tea Time
Jesse's website: Live Your Dreams Inc.
Lowell's website: LowellDavis.net
Dawn's poetry: Impassioned Versifier

I think you will find some stuff of interest in all of these diversions.

Philosopher's Wax

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Wed, 31 Dec 2008 20:56:00 +0000

I thought about waxing philosophical on how indifferent I am to New Year's Eve and all of it trappings, but as it turns out I'm to apathetic to even write about it.

However, I am now intrigued by the concept of waxing philosophical. I know this is an old timey phrase that dates back to when the word wax mostly meant to grow. Such as a waxing moon. As opposed to a waning moon.

But, I still want to invent a product called Philosopher's Wax. I'm quite certain that it could be used on both a convertible and a finely groomed mustache. A mustache like that kid at Subway has that Willy admires from a distance.

I'm told that New Year's is a time for new beginnings, but it seems to me that to arbitrarily wait for one certain point in Earth's orbit around the sun to make drastic or necessary changes in one's life is silly, but not in a good way like the putty. Make those changes when you realize they need to be made and one certainly shouldn't wait an entire year to reflect on their life.

So to New Year's and all of its trappings, I say "Bah! It is a humbug!" Besides the time with family and friends. The day off from work. All the good food and football.

I thought I would throw out the picture for September while I was at it.

This is a picture of a moonflower.

Thelma and Louise

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Tue, 30 Dec 2008 22:11:00 +0000

On Sunday night we took Jesse out to Buffet City to celebrate his birthday. Ever since that night I have had the song The Crawdad Hole stuck in my head.

You get a line and I'll get a pole Honey!
You get a line and I'll get a pole Babe!
You get a line and I'll get a pole
And we'll go down to the crawdad hole
Honey... Baby of mine

Big ole crawdad struttin' round Honey!
Big ole crawdad struttin' round Babe!
Big ole crawdad strutin' round
Like he's the King of Crawdad Town
Honey... Baby of mine

I'm gonna see that crawdad on my plate Honey!
I'm gonna see that crawdad on my plate Babe!
I'm gonna see that crawdad on my plate
With a bowl full of butter and a sweet patate
Honey... Baby of mine

Crawdad's hangin' onto my toe Honey!
Crawdad's hangin' onto my toe Babe!
Crawdad's hangin' onto my toe
I shake and shout but he won't let go
Honey... Baby of mine

What are ya gonna do when the hole runs dry Honey!
What are ya gonna do when the hole runs dry Babe!
What are ya gonna do when the hole runs dry
Sit on the banks and have a crawdad fry
Honey... Baby of mine

See that crawdad winkin' his eye Honey!
See that crawdad winkin' his eye Babe!
See that crawdad winkin' his eye
Let's turn him into crawdad pie
Honey... Baby of mine

Fry them crawdads nice an' brown Honey!
Fry them crawdads nice an' brown Babe!
Fry them crawdads nice an' brown
Grease 'em good so they'll slip right down
Honey... Baby of mine.

Here comes a man with a sack on his back Honey!
Here comes a man with a sack on his back Babe!
Here comes a man with a sack on his back
Haulin' all the crawdads he can pack
Honey... Baby of mine.

It just might be me, but that is perhaps one of the most romantic songs ever written.

But the reason this song stuck in my head is because as we were sitting around the table conversing about the important matters of the day we noticed a person walking by with their plate stacked full with crayfish.

Then a few moments later the dutiful employees of Buffet City restocked the crayfish supply immediately a guy from another table got up and put every single solitary last crayfish on his plate. It was an impressive feat in its greed, gluttony and structural engineering.

A few minutes more passed and a dutiful employee of Buffet City restocked the crayfish supply. Immediately the same gentleman got up and took every single last crayfish and heaped them onto his plate and returned to his table.

I got up and walked over to the where the crayfish formerly resided. All that was left was some murky looking water and assorted crayfish parts. It reminded me of a seen from a shipwreck movie.

I picked up the tongs and slashed the crayfish brine around. The crayfish man was thorough, but not thorough enough. I found a couple of crayfish in the bottom.

Thelma & Louise (Crayfish Style)

You didn't honestly think I was going to eat one of these creatures?

Foggy Night Supper Club

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Mon, 29 Dec 2008 18:02:00 +0000

The day after Christmas we had a very Special Friday Night Supper Club. Robert was back in town from Wyoming and was having a hankering for a tenderloin from BK's.

Jay, Jesse, Willy, Monica, Robert, Jeff and I braved the extreme weather and made the trip to BK's.

I took some pictures of the fog.

It was a beautiful night to be out and about.

August

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Sun, 28 Dec 2008 16:28:00 +0000

August's picture.

This picture was taken east of Ogden on US30 looking towards Boone.

July

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Sun, 28 Dec 2008 02:51:00 +0000

July's picture.

This picture was taken during the Ames fireworks display.

June

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Sat, 27 Dec 2008 02:41:00 +0000

The picture for June.

I took this picture one summer night when I was having difficulty sleeping. I wandered the flowerbeds with a spotlight and a camera.

Merry Christmas

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Fri, 26 Dec 2008 02:33:00 +0000

As you may know, Building 429 is one of my favorite bands. This year they released a new albums and thus one of my new favorite songs. Here in the Christmas season I felt it was necessary to share the lyrics to the song Always.

Always
I was standing in the pouring rain one dark November night
Fighting off the bitter cold when she caught my eye
Her face was taught and her eyes were filled, and to my surprise
She pulled out a photograph and my heart just stopped inside
She said, “He would’ve been three today
I miss his smile, I miss his face”
What was I supposed to say, but

CHORUS
I believe always, always
Our Savior never fails
Even when all hope is gone
God knows our pain and his promise remains
He will be with you always

He was living in a broken world, dreaming of a home
His heart was barely keeping pace when I found him all alone
Remembering the way he felt when his daddy said goodbye
Fighting just to keep the tears and the anger locked inside
He’s barely holding onto faith
But deliverance is on its way, cause

CHORUS
I believe always, always
Our Savior never fails
Even when all hope is gone
God knows our pain and his promise remains
He will be with you always

Friend, I don’t know where you are and I don’t know where you’ve been
Maybe you’re fighting for your life or just about to throw the towel in
But if you’re crying out for mercy, if there’s no hope left at all
If you’ve given everything you’ve got and you’re still about to fall
Well hold on, hold on, hold on, cause
I believe always, always
Our savior never fails
Even when all faith is gone
God knows our pain and his promise remains
Always, always, He will be with you always

Christmas Eve

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Wed, 24 Dec 2008 17:28:00 +0000

Tonight is my favorite church service of the year. I love Candlelight Service on Christmas Eve! It is one beautiful service that manages to completely encapsulate the season of Advent for me. It is one service where I definitely can feel Hope, Love, Peace and Joy.

Plus I love the symbolism of an entire church being filled with the soft warm glow of candlelight. The room starts completely dark except for the light coming from the Christ candle. Then the Christ candle lights one candle. That candle lights another candle. Until every candle in the room is lit. All the light having originated from one candle.

When the congregation sings Silent Night, I feel that song more than any other song the entire year. I would not be lying if I told you that at the end of the service when the bell strikes midnight and it is officially Christmas I always get goosebumps.

I hope your Christmas Eve is as wonderful as the one I believe that I will have.

I wanted to share a story from Andrea's sermon on Sunday because I believe it is both funny and a story worth reflecting on during the Christmas season.

A guy was standing near a cliff all by himself. He was taken by a rush of courage and curiosity and moved close to the edge.

Then he moved a little closer.

The ground underneath his feet began to give a little bit, but then it seemed to hold.

He moved a little bit closer, just to get a little bit better look at the valley below.

The ground gave out underneath his feet and the man fell down the face of the cliff. But after only a few feet his hand caught a small root and his life was spared.

But it was only for a moment. It was a small root and it quickly began to give way as well.

The man shouted out, "Is there somebody up there that can help me? God if you are there, help me!"

Then the man heard the voice of God ask, "Do you have faith in me?"

The man replied, "Yes, of course. I have total faith in you."

"Then let go."

The man thought for a second and then shouted, "Is there anybody else up there?"

I got Mark's newsletter this week:

The Taiwan Times
By Mark Wolfram

Merry Christmas! It is that time of year again where we can rejoice and celebrate the birth of our Savior, who brings us peace, joy, and hope. In the season of Christmas it is easy to get caught up in all of the “stuff” that we have to do or things that are going on. I pray that God would help all of us remember why we celebrate, and that in this message we would find the peace that comes only from Jesus.

Here in Taiwan, there are many activities that I am involved with during Christmas time. I know I have written about some of these in the past, including various skits, songs, and Christmas parties. Last night was my personal highlight of the Christmas season: Christmas caroling. Teachers and students who live at school went outside of the campus last night and sang Christmas songs at some of the local businesses. Then we gathered together to sing to the faculty and staff that live here on the campus of Concordia Middle School. Walking on the streets with the guitar and hearing the students joyfully sing praises to God always warms my heart and brings a smile to my face.

In addition to the Christmas caroling, yesterday the students of Concordia Middle School decorated their Christmas trees. Every December, the school holds a Christmas tree decorating contest. Each class is given a tree or large bush in the central part of campus. They then need to create a tree based on a Bible story. Some popular stories include: Jesus feeds 5,000, Jesus turns water into wine, the parable of the lost sheep, and Noah’s ark.

Students work in their free time in the weeks leading up to Christmas to create items to put on the Christmas tree. Part of the goal of the competition is for students to make the tree using recyclable materials such as boxes, cans, and paper. They also can have lights, but they are not supposed to buy fancy decorations. Yesterday morning and afternoon students were outside working on their trees, and then in the evening, they lit up the trees. It was beautiful. The competition is also a great way to get the students excited about Christmas, read the Bible and build cooperation and teamwork.

The school leaves the decorations up for a couple of days and one of my favorite things to do during the days after Christmas is to walk outside in the evening. I usually wait until about 9:00 and I bring my I-pod and headphones. I then walk around and look at all of the trees as they light up the night. I will also take time to stop by each one of my classes and pray for the students in those classes.
I thank God for the chance to do this, and I rejoice at the mission of this school. Most schools in Taiwan don’t celebrate Christmas, and in fact they have school on Christmas day (we actually do too). However, for the students of CMS it is not just another part of the school year. It is a chance to celebrate and understand why Christmas is important. I pray that the message of Jesus’ birth will change the lives of these students, and give them new life in Jesus.

It’s Prayer Time!
1. Please pray for the students at CMS, that they will understand the true meaning of Christmas and believe it.
2. Praise God that my online classes have finished and that I will have a little bit more time in my schedule.
3. Please pray for my teaching. We will end the semester in a couple of weeks and pray that God will help me to end well and continue to show His love to my students.
4. Please pray for my Chinese language learning. That God would help my stay focused and work hard as I attempt to learn the language. Pray also that He would present opportunities for me to use Chinese as a witness to Him.

I wish you all the peace of Christ this Christmas season. Merry Christmas!!!

Mark

If I don't see you before then, I hope that you all have a Merry Christmas!

Advent Study Gift

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Wed, 24 Dec 2008 03:59:00 +0000

Teresa and I took part in an Advent Study at church on the 4 Tuesdays of Advent.

At the end of one of the studies, the one that Teresa skipped, George Eckstein came across the room and sat on my couch. He handed me a bag and said that he had a gift more me and Teresa.

I thought this was a little bit strange, but I opened the bag up. What was inside was a very pleasant surprise.

George had come across and old postcard that my dad had made for my dad's postcard company, "Slice of Life". He scanned and printed a couple copies and framed them. It was an awesome present.

Boone Taxi Driver

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 04:51:00 +0000

I've done that thing where I have fallen behind again. I have much to post, but I will do this in somewhat of a random order.

Many of you don't know about the Boone Taxi Driver. You should consider yourself lucky that you don't know about the Boone Taxi Driver if you don't for if you know about the Boone Taxi Driver you have surely wasted upwards of 45 minutes of your life in a vain attempt at entertainment.

That being said, the Boone Taxi Driver was always the highlight of any scene that he was making and he always had the most colorful way of describing the weather. I wandered about campus a little bit on Monday night.

All I can say that it was cold enough enough that I was in physical pain, but I'm sure that the Boone Taxi Driver would have had a more colorful way of putting it. Something about Wiccans and mammaries.

I'd like to think the pain was worth the effort.

Saturday Night

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Sun, 21 Dec 2008 17:05:00 +0000

On Saturday Night I met Jeff and Yin in Des Moines for Supper. Although I was horribly sleepy when I got home on Saturday night two things reinvigorated me.

I took a brief 30 minute nap.
I watched the Paul Rhoads press conference. It was very refreshing to see a coach that actually showed passion and a desire to be at Iowa State. Time will only tell if he will be successful, but I already feel that he is the right man for the job.

When I got down to Jeff and Yin's place I was introduced to a couple of pretty fascinating things.

The first was Baxter.

The second was the 1935 Chevy that Jeff is going to restore.

We had a good dinner at Raccoon River Brewery. I tried their root beer. It wasn't bad, but it was no Red Monkey.

Matthew 25:40

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Sat, 20 Dec 2008 23:19:00 +0000

I began this Saturday morning (12-20-2008) by rising out of bed around 5:45 in the morning. I often don't sleep that well, but on this night I purposely slept on the couch so that I wouldn't sleep well and I would get up in time.

I was getting up at this awful time of day because I had to be at the Senior Citizen's Center in Ames by 6:30 to participate in the Jaycee project known as Holiday Food Baskets.

Despite my body's best effort to stop me from getting up, I did manage to fall out off the couch and stumble to the basement and take a shower. I hit the road and made it to Ames at nearly the right time.

The process of Holiday Food Baskets isn't really worth mentioning, but there are aspects of the day that are worth noting.

But before getting to those aspects I should make a confession. Deflation and the rapid falling of gas prices has put more coin in this guy's bank account. I have often noted that deflation is great, if you still have a job.

It is a poor joke and I do have more than a basic understanding of economics to know that deflation and hard economic times for other people could eventually lead to my not having a job. I do work in what is essentially a luxury industry. Nobody's job is safe, especially people that work's for a company thats services are hardly essential.

The Pastors at my church have made doing something about the homeless situation in Boone a priority for our church. As hard is it may seem to believe, Boone County has the 5th highest rate of homelessness in the state of Iowa. What makes the situation worse is that Boone does not have a homeless shelter.

There was one briefly, but the finances were mismanaged and it is no longer in existence. Now the best that Boone has to help its homeless is the Boone Biblical College, but they only take men.

I write these things because these are things that I think about lately and it can really happen to almost anybody.

The need in Story County for Holiday Food Baskets tripled from 2007 to 2008.

Andrea told us a story about a family that seemed financially secure. In 2007 they were teaching their children to buy presents for other children through the Angel Tree program. In 2008, their children were on the Angel Tree.

The first 2-3 hours of Holiday Food Baskets is basically grunt work. It is essential, but hardly rewarding. You do a lot of moving food from place A to place B to place C. After everything is organized, then people start coming in to pick up their Food Baskets.

This is the part of the project that is rewarding and I think it is slightly unfortunate that only a handful of us that participated got to take part in this one aspect of the project.

This aspect was carrying the basket of food from the Senior Center to the person's car. It is important to put a bag or rolls or some apples in a cardboard box, but I don't think you get a sense of what all of this really means or amounts to and why it is important unless you get a chance to interact with the people that are getting the food.

It can also break your heart.

While I was carrying a cardboard box of food across a street to an SUV for a young woman she told me that this box of food was really going to help her family. They had 8 people living in the same house.

It made me feel completely inadequate and helpless at the same time. I couldn't help but look into the cardboard box. Just a few moments ago it seemed like a lot of food.

A handful of apples and oranges.
A bag of celery.
A bag of potatoes.
A bag of carrots.
A ham.
2 cans of something.
A bag of rolls.

All of a sudden I felt that I should have run in and gotten them a second box. I should have gotten them a third box. The ham was nothing to sniff at, but I would be lying if I didn't say that the ham that we had on our Christmas table that fed 9 people was at least 4 times larger than the ham we gave out. I didn't do this though. The bureaucracy of such things precluded that people had to sign in with MICA and people were designated so much food.

I just wished the young woman a "Merry Christmas" and walked back inside. It is my regret that I didn't just go grab another box for this family. It was a regret that would be doubled and then doubled again.

We had made up 200 Holiday Food Baskets. At the end of the event around 50 remained. Here is where my regret doubled the first time.

We loaded up the excess food and took it to MICA. As it turns out, MICA doesn't really have that much capacity for storing frozen hams. Their freezer was already full and they needed to make room. To do this they gave each of us a turkey.

My regret doubled again.

So now I have this turkey weighing on my conscience, but I throw it in the trunk of my car and drive off.

My first stop is Becky's. I'm supposed to stop at her place to pick up some Christmas gifts. Some for me and some for Teresa. What I learn on this stop is that Becky thinks I'm going to end up in a ditch some time in the near future.

I know she has had this fear for quite some time. When Shannon and I went up to Cedar Falls she gave me an extensive quiz on what kind of safety equipment I had in the car in case we went in a ditch. It basically boiled down to a thermos of hot chocolate. This didn't seem to satisfy her.

She packed a gift bag full of food. Every time I would pull a new tin of food out she would tell me to "keep that in my car in case you go in a ditch."

I do not discount the possibility that I might someday go in a ditch, but the closest I've ever come to going into a ditch was in the middle of the summer and the reason why is because I was reading the newspaper while I was driving to work.*

If the weather is bad, I don't read the newspaper.

After I left Becky's I stopped at Shannon's to watch her make Christmas candy. She also bound my calendars for me.

Somewhere in between the "pink stuff" and the experimental caramel (which involved the use of a candy thermometer - who invented the candy thermometer??) the lack of quality sleep on the couch began to catch up to me in a massive way.

I bid my adieu since I was going to Des Moines for supper with Jeff and Yin and I was hoping to get a nap of Wentworthian proportions in before I hit the road.

Then on Sunday morning in church, Phil announced that a new family in Boone was homeless.

And I still have this turkey on my conscience.

*Not counting the skunk story.

May

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Sat, 20 Dec 2008 02:26:00 +0000

May's picture.

This picture is from the mission trip I took to Cedar Rapids to help clean out houses after the flood.

April

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 02:18:00 +0000

The image for April.

This picture was taken in Jester Park.

March

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 02:12:00 +0000

The picture for March.

This picture of a flower was taken at the Iowa State Fair.

February

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Wed, 17 Dec 2008 02:03:00 +0000

The picture selected for February.

This picture of a fence was taken north of Boone in an old pioneer cemetery.

January

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 01:41:00 +0000

The 2009 Photography 139 Calendar went through quite a large metamorphosis this year. I wasn't sure that I was going to produce a calendar this year. The amount of time involved in the designing, printing, laminating and binding the calendar was becoming a burden on me and my friends. I can't even count how many hours last year Jesse, Jay and Nader put in to making these calendars.

This year I outsourced the printing of the calendar. This was much harder for me to do than one might suspect. I think I don't necessarily give the outward appearance of being a control freak, but I do have things in my life where compromise is not to be considered.

Once I was able to talk myself into outsourcing the printing, everything else sort of fell into place. The amount of time put into the calendar this year by me and my friends was only a couple of hours. Most of the time was actually spent in designing the calendar. Jesse and Jay were not even bothered at all.

I can thank Mike Vest for being my liaison between me and my printer. He also punched every hole in the calendars for hanging. I also need to thank Shannon for binding all of the calendars.

I have yet to distribute all of the calendars, but I would like to beginning sharing the pictures that I selected for the 2009 calendar.

Below is the picture for January.

This is the only picture in the calendar that wasn't taken in 2008. This self-portrait was taken late in 2007. The location of this picture was the Campanile on the Iowa State University campus.

Bring Back McCarney

noreply@blogger.com (photography139) — Mon, 15 Dec 2008 02:28:00 +0000

Now that Chizik has tucked tail and ran out of Ames, it is time for Iowa State to admit to one of the two biggest mistakes they ever made and bring Dan McCarney home!

A bad picture of McCarney being carried off the field by his players after his last game as the Cyclones coach.

The sad thing is that even if we were to get down on our knees and beg, I don't think he would take us back. He is more than justified in feeling that way.