(Admittedly this is being posted a day late.)
Happy Birthday!
Category Archives: Derrick
Box Brothers
Ames on the Half Shell was rain shortened on Friday night. At least we got in about half of the concert. I only had to go on stage to make a brief speech about our sponsors when it started to rain. I didn’t get a chance to announce last call or really make the FULL sponsor speech. I also was denied the chance to announce last call. Oh well, I still got to do the radio interview for 105.1. I think I came off as a tad bit arrogant.
Here are some pictures.
There are about 40 more images in the Ames on the Half Shell – 2008 Gallery.
Ames on the Half Shell – 2008
Ames on the Half Shell is a bit different this week. Since Friday is Independence Day there are a ton of stuff planned for downtown Ames by the Main Street Cultural District. Half Shell will run from 1-6 instead of 5-8. The bands will be Burnin’ Sensations and The Nadas.
Burnin’ Sensations
Last Friday was another hugely successful night for Ames on the Half Shell. The band was Burnin’ Sensations and they were phenomenal. Here are a few pictures from the evening.
Abi and Melissa
Dennis
Sara
Birthday Girl
Scott
Derrick
Burnin’ Sensations
Chad
Andy and Charby
Working the Picnic Table
Possibly Discussing an UnHingd Reunion?
Every once in awhile when I’m editing pictures I find something that amuses me in a picture that was completely unintentional. Sometimes that happens when I’m not really concentrating, but just taking pictures quickly. One of those pictures above amuses me in just such a way.
I took a picture of one of the singers from Burnin’ Sensation out working the crowd. I was impressed by this because they were the first band to really work the crowd in such a fashion.
I think if there was somebody standing on top of my table playing a tambourine, I would probably be so impressed I would watch them, but that isn’t the case for everybody. Some people would rather text message.
I also made a panoramic image of the event. These are really hard to post because of their extreme width. So below I spun this image counterclockwise 90 degrees so that you can at least go through the image to some degree. It is also compressed to about 10% of its actual size. In its full resolution it is much crisper.
Of course there are about 40 more images in the Snapshots Gallery in an album named AOTHS-Burnin’ Sensations. It is located right next to the Family Night Photo Album.
AMES ON THE HALF SHELL – 2008
I should also point out that I had a new life experience on Saturday. To say it was my life experience isn’t really fair, but I overheard something that I thought I would never hear, not even in Iowa.
After a long discussion about life with Becky on her sweet front porch, I made my way down to Tradewinds for the conclusion of Shannon’s birthday shindig. While I was there I was sitting at a table where a creepy guy was putting the “moves” on a lady friend.
One of the things he said to impress her was that he was once up to his nipples in pig feces. I guess you go with what you got, but if that is what you got, maybe you should lie.
Of course, it all happens again this Friday. Not the pig poo guy, but Ames on the Half Shell will happen again this Friday. 5-8 at Bandshell Park. 3 bucks gets you in the door. Another 3 bucks gets a beer in your hand.* 1 buck gets you some Red Monkey.
This week the band is Vivace. They are also excellent. They are one of the two bands that I booked. I got to play hardball with them. The conversation went something like this:
Me: So how much do you charge?
Vivace: XXXXXX bucks. A little more for an outdoor show.
Me: Well this is an outdoor show.
Vivace: Well we can keep it the same.
Me: Sounds like a deal.
Hope to see some of you there. Even my Corporate Sellout friends.
*Technically 3 bucks gets you an orange token that magically gets turned into beer at the beer tent.
Family Night
Last Friday was Family Night for Ames on the Half Shell. By all measurable criteria the event was a smashing success. More than twice the amount of children made it to Family Night this year than last.
Plus I got to see many of my friends and their children. Take a look at some of the fun that was had on that evening.
Of course there are about 80 more pictures in on my website in the AOTHS Gallery.
AMES ON THE HALF SHELL
Here is a Family Night Fun Fact. Despite the fact that there were 5 times the amount of children at Family Night than there were for the first night of of AOTHS and Red Monkey was free for children, less than half the amount of Red Monkey that was consumed on the first night was consumed on Family Night.
If you picked up what I was laying down with that big run-on sentence, you might be wondering how that was possible. The fact is that I am to blame. I laid off the Red Monkey during Family Night because I thought the youth of Central Iowa would pick up my slack. They did not. Now I have to hit the Red Monkey doubly hard this Friday night to make up for lost time. But I mean really, what is wrong with this generation?
I also learned a few things on Family Night. I learned that Shannon can’t blow bubbles. I learned that if you sign up to run the 5K during Scandinavian Days they give you a pretty sweet free shirt. I learned that Becky proved that she doesn’t know anything about hats because she wore a balloon hat around most of the night. I learned that even if you have somebody watching the bounce house, children will get in a fight and scare other small children. I learned that the Baier children will take their tats like men when the time comes for them to get their tats. I learned that security is such a tough job that I didn’t get a chance to talk to everybody nearly as long as I had hoped.
Of course I would be remiss if I didn’t point out that Ames on the Half Shell will happen again this Friday night. This week the band is Burnin’ Sensations and they are excellent. If you have a hole in your schedule between 5-8, this is the place to be. Also Friday is somebody’s birthday. I don’t wish to embarrass them (yet), but at the very least it is worth the price of admission (79 cents less than a gallon of gas) to wish her a Happy Birthday!*
Plus it is Friday the 13th. I’m not a superstitious person, but it might be a good day to be in a large crowd.
*That exclamation mark is not a random choice of punctuation.
Memorial Day and the Crystal Skull
Memorial Day wasn’t really meant to be a good-time-feel-good holiday. It was established to honor Union Soldiers that died in the Civil War and was first known as Decoration Day.
Regardless of its original intentions, this solemn holiday has become a chance for most Americans to barbecue and enjoy a 3 Day weekend. I’m not different than most Americans. I just wanted to have a good time on Memorial Day.
My day started out good enough. I watched 4 straight hours of Animal Planet with Alexis in the morning. Jay came over and we had tacos and nachos for lunch. Then we headed over to the Cinemark to catch a matinée of Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull with Derrick.
+++SPOILERS+++
Usually I’m not the type of person that gives away spoilers about movies. I want people to see movies on their own, but this is one movie that I don’t feel the need to protect any of its secrets. This movies is a piece of garbage.
I’ve alway been a big fan of the Indiana Jones movies. Sure Temple of Doom blows a little bit, but the other 2 are excellent. Crystal Skull is an insult to all 3 of those movies.
I didn’t understand why so many Star Wars fans were upset with the prequels that came out a few years back. True, they weren’t very good, but the first 3 Star Wars movies stunk as well. What was the big deal? Instead of 3 movies with terrible acting and writing now you had 6 of them. Star Wars fans should have been elated.
I still don’t understand Star Wars fans, (there are certainly much, much better science fiction movies out there, I refer you to the two that Stanley Kubrick made 2001: A Space Odyssey and A Clockwork Orange just for starters) but now I can relate to them a bit. I’ve seen a movie franchise that I love torn to shreds before my very eyes.
On Sunday when we were driving down to The House of Bricks Willy told me that Crystal Skull was not very good. I told him that I could handle it if it wasn’t very good, but I would not be able to handle one thing. If they tried to set up a series of sequels starring Even Stevens, I would be angry. I would leave the theater in a rage.
I should have seen the warning signs. Even Willy would be the first to admit that I have much higher standards for movies than he does. The dude loves Van Damme movies!
Despite my bold proclamations, I left the theater angry. In fact, I haven’t been this angry leaving the theater since I sat through the misogynistic propaganda piece masquerading as entertainment known as Sin City. I was madder than when I left the theater after Transformers. Another example of taking something I loved from my childhood and making it suck. Incidentally also starring Even Stevens.
The one good thing I can say about Crystal Skull is that they didn’t end the movie by setting up sequels for Even Stevens. They came close. They made you think that is what they were going to do. At the end of the movie Indy’s hat blows off a hat rack and rolls to a stop at Even Stevens’ feet. As he bends over to pick up the hat, Indy picks it up before him and puts it on his head. Me physically vomiting in the aisles was averted.
I suppose that I don’t have time to write on all the things I hated about this movie, because there are so many of them. I’ll try to keep it to just two.
ALIENS!!!!
Are you kidding me? Could Lucas and Spielberg not turn the last Indiana Jones movie into a science fiction movie? I now fully expect that the next Spielberg WWII movie to involve aliens in some way, shape or form.
CGI!!!
CGI has already, for the most part, ruined most summer movies. It was as if they had missed the point of the first three movies. They were an homage to old time serial movies and they were done with trick photography and stuntmen. Crystal Skull is an homage to the other 3 movies basically, only with way too much CGI. I should have known it was coming when the first shot of the movie features a CGI prairie dog.
My day was ruined from that point on and I don’t think that there was much that could have happened to turn my day around.
+++SPOILERS OVER+++
My day did turn around though. I headed out to Roland for Monica’s barbecue. The only low point of the barbecue was having Happy Birthday sang to me for the third time in 8 days. I’m glad I won’t have to hear that again for some time. Although Monica did make me a sweet Jello birthday cake.
I don’t really like getting presents all that much. Unless it is something the person has made, like a sweet painting or piece of stained glass or cake or rhubarb pie or a card.
Teresa sent me this birthday card.
There is the occasional exception. Sara got me this sweet gift:
The camera is 30 years old and still is in its original box. This will look great on my shelf of old cameras.
Bad Photos
I got all of the old pictures off of my phone. There aren’t a terribly large amount of pictures on there because the old phone is about 4 years old and didn’t have much memory on it.
It turns out almost every picture on that phone ranges from bad to horrible. Although some are amusing.
One major plus of the new phone is the memory card. I can use pictures taken by a real camera for the Caller ID Photo. As you can tell by these images, that will make a big difference.
Tell My Friend Willie Brown
I have a week chock full of fun activities, but I think one might stand above all the others. Tonight Derrick and I are having a little bonding time by watching Crossroads.
If you instantly thought of the Britney Spears movie, you are not my friend. Please erase my e-mail from your address book. Delete my phone number from your cell phone. Unless, you are willing to learn. Then you can remain my friend, but you may have to make amends for your sin.
Those of you that instantly thought of the 1986 Walter Hill classic, good job. You get a gold star and might get a birthday present from me if you meet the rest of the birthday present getting criteria.
This movie is so sweet that it even eclipses the other events from this week.
I got this wad of cash last night at the bowling league awards ceremony. Yes ladies and gentleman, that is what 38 smackers looks like.
But even getting money is eclipsed by Crossroads.
New Road Trip Hat
I’m even going on two road trips this week to break in my new Road Trip Hat. The Big Jesus Road Trip on Friday. Then on Saturday I’m going on The Cardiff Giant Road Trip. The Cardiff Giant Road Trip had taken on a bit of an added dimension after some information I received last Wednesday. I don’t want too give too much away, but think “Gypsum Penis”. At least if I correctly deducted what the term “modest” was meant to insinuate.
I’m also going to see Chicago on Thursday at Stephens.
Plus, I’m having supper tomorrow night at Jimmy’s Barbecue.
If that isn’t enough, there is serving food for the Mother-Daughter banquet on Saturday night.
Of course there is the traditional Mother’s Day Barbecue on Sunday.
Yet they are all eclipsed by tonight’s viewing of Crossroads.
Derrick recently went down to the home of Delta Blues for a 3 or 4 day extensive training session with Peavey in Meridian, Mississippi. I gave him the mission of either getting a Mississippi String Tie (which is what a bluesman wears in Mississippi) or at least making it to Highway 61.
The folks at Peavey kept him so busy that he never accomplished either mission. In fact the only time he was free from them he made a trip to a gas station. He did report to me that they served catfish at this gas station. We both agree that Gas Station Catfish would make either a great song or album title.
I thought I would just share some of my favorite scenes from Crossroads.
The Crossroads
“Where I come from, you don’t blow no harp, you don’t get no pussy.”
Highway 61
Mississippi Blues Tie
“Look at this old guitar here you been squeakin’ on. I bet you saw this thing in a music store and bought it just because you thought it was beat up! Well you got it all wrong. Muddy Waters invented electricity.”
“Where you learn to play them pussy chords, in music school?… Now if you spend as much time with your hands on them strings as you do on this girl’s ass, you might get somewhere.”
“Lots of towns… Lots of songs… Lots of women… Good times… Bad times… Only thing I wanted anyone to say is… ‘He could really play… He was good’.”
The Crossroads Again.
The Devil’s Guitarist.
The Guitar Battle.
Now that is a movie. I’m already getting me some of them Crossroads Blues:
I went to the crossroads, fell down on my knees
I went to the crossroads, fell down on my knees
Asked the Lord above, have mercy now, save poor Bob if you pleaseStandin’ at the crossroads, tried to flag a ride
Whee-hee, I tried to flag a ride
Didn’t nobody seem to know me, everybody pass me byStandin’ at the crossroads, risin’ sun goin’ down
Standin’ at the crossroads baby, the risin’ sun goin’ down
I believe to my soul now, po’ Bob is sinkin’ downYou can run, you can run, tell my friend Willie Brown
You can run, you can run, tell my friend Willie Brown
That I got the crossroad blues this mornin’, Lord, baby I’m sinkin’ downI went to the crossroad, mama, I looked east and west
I went to the crossroad, babe, I looked east and west
Lord, I didn’t have no sweet woman, ooh well, babe, in my distress
Little White Lye Bonus
What you are about to experience is bits of a national advertising campaign that I would suggest that Little White Lye Soap launch immediately. However, I don’t have much pull in that department. So we’ll have to see what happens.
These pictures are of the actual models that I would use, but the background is not the background that I would use, for most of the models because I just took a picture of them the first time that I ran into them. Just imagine that the background is consistent with the quote underneath the characters.
“After a long day of kissing babies and pressing flesh, nothing cleans off the smell of constituent like Little White Lye Soap.”
“Oh my! After a long evening at the theater with Tennessee Williams, nothing cleans off the powerful odor of mendacity like Little White Lye Soap.”
“Nothing relaxes me and makes me ready for sleep after a long day’s work than a hot shower with Little White Lye Soap.”
“After a long morning of schooling chumps, nothing takes the rank of other people’s failures and broken dreams off me like Little White Lye Soap.”
“After a long night of grinding on the honeys in the clubs, nothing rids a dance machine of the stench of barfly like Little White Lye Soap.”
“There is just no way around it, I’m a handsome man and Little White Lye keeps me handsome by making me clean, while being gentle on my sensitive skin.”
My woman likes my skin to be soft to the touch and Little White Lye Soap keeps my skin soft and that makes my woman happy.”
“After a long night of rocking, Little White Lye Soap cleans off the reek of groupie and leaves me smelling fresh in the morning.”
“After a long day at the office explaining to old people that their 401K dropping 25% in value in the last week is just a normal market fluctuation I feel morally dirty. Nothing restores me to moral equilibrium like a long bath with Little White Lye Soap.”
I imagine these running in GQ. I’ll have to wait and see what the boss says.
Mendacious
Over the last few days I have intermittently worked on some photos for a big product endorsement I’m going to be doing in the very near future. I asked a few friends to pose for the picture, without giving them any information. I would have thought that our friendship would have been enough for them to just sign on to be willing participants for my photo experiments. I learned that some of my friends just don’t trust me that much. Here is a break down of friends that trust me and friends that need to ask questions constantly:
Friends that Trust
Baier
Jesse
Nader
Russell
Faust
Derrick
Friends that Don’t Trust
Jay
Willy
Andree
I don’t know if these guys are just the untrusting sort or if I have wronged them at some point in our past.
New Toy
I got a new toy for the camera in the mail yesterday. I did some experimenting with it.
I know some cynics out there are thinking: “Wow you bought a toy that takes blurry pictures, congratulations.”
I would only respond with a smile and say, “Yes I did!”