Category Archives: Basketball

ROUNDBALL ORACLES – YEAR 12

I recently presented The Trophy for winning the 12th year of the Roundball Oracles to this year’s champion… Michelle Haupt

It was an exciting NCAA Tournament and an equally exciting Roundball Oracles NCAA Tournament Pool. If North Carolina would’ve won the NCAA Championship Game, Sara Lockner would’ve come home with the trophy this year. Alas, it wasn’t meant to be. Congratulations Michelle! May your reign be short.


Roundball Oracles - Year 12 Champion - Michelle Haupt
Michelle Haupt – Newest Immortal (Pictured with Lily)
Past Roundball Oracles Champions (The List of Immortals)

2005 – William McAlpine
2006 – William McAlpine
2007 – Tim Peterson
2008 – Mark Wolfram
2009 – Mark Wolfram
2010 – Mark Wolfram
2011 – Carrie Baier
2012 – Lowell Davis
2013 – William McAlpine
2014 – Brandon Kahler
2015 – Derek Dohrman
2016 – Michelle Haupt

Here be the final standings.
1.  Michelle Haupt –  275
2.  Sean Clubine –  270
3.  sara lockner – 259
4. Yours Truly 255
5. Micky Augustin 245
6.  Angie DeWaard 241
7.  Jackson Faust 241
8.  Derek Dohrman 237
9.  Frank Meiners 233
10.  Toby Sebring 230
11,  Lowell Davis 230
12,  Mark Wolfram 228
13.  Jason Baier 227
14,  Corey Faust 221
15,  Paul Golden 220
16,  Wily McAlpine 218
17, Jordan Toot 217
18.  Jesse Howard 216
19.  Shannon Bardole 215
20.  Benjamin Baier 214
21.  Liz Nordeen 214
21. Jill Gorshe 214
23 . Jon DeWaard 207
24. JJ Baier 204
25.  Dawn Krause 203
26.  Nader Parsaei 202
27,  Brandon Kahler 201
28.  Carrie Baier 197
29.  Jorge Rios 197
30.  shawn lockner 194
31.  Jen Gorshe 193
32.  Derrick Gorshe 193
33.  Andree Jauhari 193
34.  tim peterson 192
35.  Bill Wentworth 183
36.  Olivia Baier 180
37.  Russ Kennerly 180
38.  Carla Stensland 175
39.  William Baier 170
40.  Rachel Johnson 167
41.  Robert Henning 162
42.  Joe Lynch 156
43.  Laura Priest 152

Laura (Miller) Priest won the 3rd Annual “The Sara” for last place adult that tried. Joining the trophy’s namesake Sara Lockner and Derrick Gorshe as past winners. I don’t have a picture of Laura with her new trophy yet, but I will as soon as I get “The Sara” in the mail, it arrives in Manhattan, and she sends me a picture with her new pride and joy.

ROUNDBALL ORACLES – YEAR 12

Once again, the Madness is upon us. It is time to put your basketball knowledge to the test and try to take your place upon the list of immortals.

If you are interested in joining this year’s pool. Contact me via email at bennett@photography139.com.

Once again this year, there is no fee.

The champion will win The Roundball Oracles Trophy.

The last place adult (that gave full effort) will receive the Sara Lockner Good Effort Trophy.

League rules, how to get in, past champs below.

Rules

First Round: The weight for each correct pick is 1. The seed of the winning team is added to the correct pick total.
Second Round: The weight for each correct pick is 2. The seed of the winning team is added to the correct pick total.
Sweet 16: The weight for each correct pick is 4. The seed of the winning team is added to the correct pick total.
Elite : The weight for each correct pick is 8. The seed of the winning team is added to the correct pick total.
Final Four: The weight for each correct pick is 16. There is no bonus applied.
Championship: The weight for each correct pick is 32. There is no bonus applied.

Tiebreaker: The total score of the Championship game. Constitution:

Past Roundball Oracle Champions:

2015 – Derek Dohrman
2014 – Brandon Kahler
2013 – William McAlpine
2012 – Lowell Davis
2011 – Carrie Baier
2010 – Mark Wolfram
2009 – Mark Wolfram
2008 – Mark Wolfram
2007 – Tim Peterson
2006 – William McAlpine
2005 – William McAlpine

Past Sara Lockner Good Effort Recipients:

2015 – Derrick Gorshe
2014 – Sara Lockner

AIN’T NO PLACE TO HAVE A BABY



When you got no man to give it his last name…


And her folks back in Manhattan didn’t want her or her bundle…


So she took her child and caught an evening train…


She found a job in Denver washing dishes in a diner…


At least it buys her baby milk to drink…


He once told her she was pretty…


But the only ring it got her…


Was the ring of grease that runs around the sink…


Yes she lay beside him gentle…


‘Cause he told her that he loved her…


And he made her dance before the music played…


But at least she didn’t beg him…


She’d rather wash her dishes…


It makes her feel as if her hands are clean…

5 Favorite Hilton Magicians

This week’s list is my 5 Favorite Cyclone Basketball Players.

For the purpose of this list, current Cyclones are ineligible. If I update this list in a year or so, I would be shocked if Georges and Jameel aren’t on it. Or even Duley. Naz and Matt and Monte in 2 years. Maybe even Deonte.

There is something I do love about every current Cyclone. However, this is a list about the past. Let’s get to it.


5. Royce White

Royce only played for Iowa State for 1 year, but he put Iowa State back on the map. he was the most unique basketball player I’ve ever seen. He was built like a defensive lineman, but the guy had handle and incredible court vision. The only other Cyclone that could ever pass like Royce White was Jamaal Tinsley. Strike that. The only other college basketball play I’ve ever seen that could pass like Royce White was Jamaal Tinsley.

The reason Royce will always be one of my favorites is that after what felt like an eternity wandering the desert, Royce White took Iowa State back to the NCAA tournament.

When Creighton, thankfully, took the UNI grad that was posing as a basketball coach off of ISU’s hands, Fred Hoiberg took over as the head Cyclone. I was livid at the time. I thought it was a gimmick. A publicity stunt. Iowa State would stink for 5 more years and then we could hire a real coach. Then in 5 more years, we might be decent again.

I first began to have faith in Hoiberg when he signed Royce White. I was a believer when Royce leads us back to the dance.

Royce’s team lost to the eventual National Champions the Kentucky Wildcats. In a game that featured about 7 future NBA lottery picks, all playing for Kentucky, Royce White was the best player on the court.

One of my all-time favorite plays in Cyclone history was when Royce White blocked a shot, rebounded the ball, dribbled the length of the court and then dunked it.

Then he beat his chest and yelled at the crowd, “I’m the best player.”

He was. It makes me sad to think what Iowa State could’ve done if Royce had returned for 1 or 2 more seasons.


4. Marcus Fizer

Fizer is probably the best player in Iowa State history. I believe he is the only McDonald’s All-American to ever play at Iowa State. He didn’t start his career out like a future lottery pick, but when he got it going, he was the star of the greatest team in Cyclone history.

That team won both the Big 12 Regular Season Championship and the Big !2 Tournament Championship.

Iowa State would get shafted with a 2 seed for the NCAA Tournament and be placed in the same region as the unanimous #1, the Michigan State Spartans. To make matters worse, the Elite Eight matchup was basically a home game for the Spartans.

Iowa State still probably would’ve won that game, but (similar to Bill Self) Tom Izzo travels with his own personal refs. In the final minutes, the refs called a Blarge and fouled out a key Cyclone.

Don’t know what a Blarge is? It is because it is a made up BS call to steal our National Championship and give it to Michigan State.

To this day I hate everything about Michigan State. They can burn that school down, and that I would show up with marshmallows and graham crackers.

That being said, Fizer was the Big 12 Player of the Year and a First Team All-American. His dunk on Texas center Chris Mihm was one of the greatest plays in Cyclone history.


3. Jamaal Tinsley

Tinsley was Fizer’s running mate. Although Monte Morris (when he is done) might have something to say about this, Tinsley is the greatest point guard in Cyclone history. He was also perhaps the greatest winner in Iowa State history.

Tinsley played 2 years for Iowa State. He never lost a game in Hilton Coliseum. Iowa State also won 2 Big 12 Regular Season Conference Championships and 1 Big 12 Tournament Championship while Tinsley was at Iowa State. He helped lead Iowa State to the Elite Eight and there is no reason to talk about the following year’s NCAA Tournament.

It just wasn’t Tinsley’s success that causes so much affection for him. Tinsley was a New York City guard. That means that his game had flair. He had the best handle of any player I’ve ever seen (in college). He had the ability to make anybody that tried to guard him look foolish with his vast array of moves. On more than one occasion, he dribbled the ball between a hapless opponent’s legs on his way to the hoop.

It was just so much fun to watch him play.


2. Melvin Ejim

There are many reasons I love Melvin Ejim. One of the reasons is that he was a student-athlete. He is the first Big 12 Player of the Year in history that was also an Academic All-American.

Melvin holds the Big 12 Single Game Scoring Record by scoring 48 against TCU. Most of those points were scored by thunderous dunks.

Ejim also is a perfect example of hard work and determination. Every year he got better. Every year.

He is one of only 3 Cyclones to have 1,000 career points.

When Ejim graduated he was Iowa State’s all-time leader in wins. (Niang has since eclipsed this record.) He was part of 3 NCAA Tournament teams, including a Sweet Sixteen run his senior year.

But more than anything, Melvin Ejim is just the kind of person you want representing your alma mater. Intelligent, eloquent, hard working, and capable of delivering soul shattering dunks.


1. Dedric Willoughby

Willoughby is my favorite Cyclone of all-time, but by the slimmest of margins. On any given day he could be swapped with Ejim. However, on this day, I’m giving Willoughby the nod. Willoughby’s staying power comes from 2 facts.

1. He was the best player on the first Iowa State basketball team I loved.
2. With apologies to Naz (and maybe Monte), Willoughby was the most clutch Cyclone in history.

Willoughby’s Cyclones were a ragtag bunch of players that were seemed like they came out of a Hollywood sports movie. Kelvin Cato – the shot blocker. Shawn Bankhead – the defensive stopper. Jacy Holloway – the point guard that doesn’t shoot. Kenny Pratt – the greatest junkballer ever.

If you saw these guys on the basketball court, you’d never expect them to win a game, but they won the final Big 8 Tournament Championship.

Willoughby was this team’s sharpshooting leader. He is the only Cyclone to make more than 100 3 pointers in a season. His teams played at a considerably slower pace than the current Cyclones too.

It saddens me how few Iowa State fans remember Willoughby now. That is okay, we have to appreciate what we have now too.

Honorable Mentions

  • Diante Garrett
  • DeAndre Kane
  • Jeff Hornacek
  • Paul Shirley
  • Dustin Hogue
  • Rahshon Clark
  • Chris Babb
  • Curtis Stinson
  • Kenny Pratt
  • Shawn Bankhead
  • Stevie Johnson
  • Michael Nurse
  • Kantrail Horton
  • Jeff Grayer
  • Elmer Robinson
  • Barry Stevens
  • Terry Woods
  • Will Blalock
  • Jackson Vroman
  • Kelvin Cato

But as always, feel free to express your own opinion in the COMMENTS section below.

With the Beefcake Pantyhose

You can look at this collection of losers for RED from the WEEKLY PHOTO CHALLENGE in a couple of different ways.

Either I just wanted an excuse more pictures of my dog.

OR

Well that is interesting.

You see, there is a setting on my camera that drops out all other colors but red. It is far from 100%, but it creates interesting images.


RED-LOSER

RED - LOSER

RED - LOSER

RED - LOSER

RED - LOSER

RED - LOSER

RED - LOSER

RED - LOSER

RWPE - LOSER

RED - LOSER

RED - LOSER

RED - LOSER

RED - LOSER

Oh… also a picture of my trip to Hilton with Jen, Derrick, Evie, and Layla thrown in at the end there.

Incidental

Here are a few pictures I like that come from New Toy, but don’t fit into any particular narrative.



Went to Hilton Madness with Willy and Derrick.

Fizer and Frese mixing it up with the young pups.


Youth Room


Mike, John, and Tim at the Event Formerly Known as the Methodist Men Steak Fry.


A packed house.


View staring out my living room window.


Teresa’s paint.


Ernie painting.

The New Toy has come in handy now and again. I think it is a keeper.

Insta

Feel like revisiting my Instagram account. It has been a long, long, time.

Obviously, if you follow me on Instagram, like a boss, you’ve already experienced these.

A few of my favorites:


That was fun! We’ll have to do that again sometime!

Phonetos – Vol. 1

Although I haven’t touched the real camera lately, I have sorta documented some stuff with my cruddy camera on my phone. Thought I would post some of those from the last few months. Remember, these are taken with a cruddy camera phone.

If you follow me on Instagram, you’ve already seen many of these. Feel free to carry on.



Best donuts. Ever.


Our waiter at Pig Ate My Pizza. Carrying Naima’s favorite toy.


This was apropos of that weekend. I love John Cusack.


Iowa State Relay for Life


Such a great game!


Naima had Willy protect her while we watched the ISU-Oklahoma game.


I still don’t think they’ve done anything about this building.


Dre’s Birthday. Watching a little March Madness.


Layla’s Melancholy Lion.


Network Engineering Night at Welch Ave.


Missouri.


Cousins.


First birthday party I’ve been to that was on the grounds of a federal prison.


Naima.


New love. Rico’s Tacos.


ISU Spring Game.

Confirmation Sunday with my Confirmation Mentee Mitchell.


Derek. Winner of this year’s Roundball Oracles.


Uncola at the Otho Pub.


Carla’s Art.


Logan really enjoyed his first Adobe experience.


Jim. The last night of bowling. Ever.

Dinner with a member of the Illuminati.


Miss May.


Bulletin from Pastor Sarah’s amazing Superhero Sermon Series.


The wall from the Citywide Youth Group.

More soonish…

ROUNDBALL ORACLES YEAR 11

Wow! What an amazing season of College Basketball. Especially in the state of Iowa. Almost everybody has something to cheer about:

The Iowa State Cyclones won the Big 12 for the second straight year. They are looking to make good on Hoiberg’s promise of a national championship.
The UNI Panthers won whatever backwaters conference they are in.
Iowa returns to the NCAA Tournament for the first time since 2006. They have a chance at their first tournament win since 2001. Gold star for Iowa!

There are all sorts of great potential matchups all over the place:

Fred Hoiberg could coach against one of his NBA coaches in the second round.
Iowa State and Iowa could play each other in the Sweet Sixteen.
Another possibility would be a dream point guard matchup between the best 2 point guards in the country in Monte Morris and Kevin Pangos.
The Elite Eight could feature a rematch of the 1944 Final Four game between Iowa State and Utah.

However, if you want to place your name on the List of Immortals like these people:

Roundball Oracles Champions

2014 – Brandon Kahler
2013 – William McAlpine
2012 – Lowell Davis
2011 – Carrie Baier
2010 – Mark Wolfram
2009 – Mark Wolfram
2008 – Mark Wolfram
2007 – Tim Peterson
2006 – William McAlpine
2005 – William McAlpine

All you need to do is contact me and I’ll get you the information posthaste.

The only “buy in” is pride. First place does win a trophy. The last place trying adult, also wins a trophy. Small chance there will be a traveling trophy this year, but I’m not made of money. Maybe some of the rest of you need to start kicking in on the bills around here. I’m looking at you Naima.

In case you need a refresher on how last year’s Oracles did, look below.

Rank    Oracle Score    Correct    Champion Last Year
1. Brandon Kahler 255 40 Florida 18th
2. Michael Augustin 241 42 Florida 31st
3. Paul Golden 235 41 Michigan State DNP
4. Jordan Toot 228 39 Florida 9th
5. Jon DeWaard 224 39 Florida 5th
6. Mark Wolfram 222 38 Florida 8th
7. Lowell Davis 216 40 Florida DNP
8. Andree Jauhari 210 38 Iowa State 28th
9. Derrick Gorshe 208 38 Iowa State 14th
10. Carrie Baier 205 37 Michigan State 19th
11. Robert Henning 205 36 Florida 10th
12. Bill Wentworth 204 38 Florida 15th
13. Nate Miller 203 36 Iowa State DNP
14. Frank Meiners 201 38 Michigan State 11th
14. Jesse Howard 201 37 Kansas 3rd
16. Corey Faust 200 36 Iowa State 7th
17. Humble Narrator 196 36 Iowa State 33rd
18. William Mcalpine 196 38 Florida 1st
19. Angie DeWaard 191 35 Arizona 6th
20. Sean Clubine 189 36 Syracuse 13th
21. Carla Stensland 189 35 Iowa State DNP
22. Ben Baier 188 35 Arizona 32nd
23. Jackson Faust 185 36 Florida 16th
24. Michelle Haupt 181 35 Arizona 26th
25. Elizabeth Nordeen 181 35 Iowa State 21st
26. Russell Kennerly 180 34 Florida 24th
27. Olivia Baier 178 34 Arizona DNP
28. Jason Baier 175 35 Florida 24th
29. Tim Peterson 175 34 Iowa State 22nd
30. Becky Perkovich 175 35 Iowa State 27th
31. Shawn Lockner 173 33 Wisconsin 4th
32. J.J. Baier 164 24 Michigan 29th
33. Ryan Halvorson 163 33 Arizona 18th
34. Dawn Krause 149 32 Arizona 23rd
35. Will Baier 147 23 Iowa State 34th
36. Sara Lockner 143 28 Florida DNP

Like I said, if you want in and have some extra pride to spare, you know where to find me.

Photo(s) of the Day 0007


Brandon with his Championship Trophy.
Brandon Kahler – 2014 Roundball Oracles Champion
I apologize for taking so long to reveal the champion of Year 10 of the Roundball Oracles. But I think my post college basketball season depression (or PCBSD as mental health professionals call it) was even greater this year than in years past. You know, something to do with having to play the “What If” game over and over and over again. Cyclone fans know what I’m talking about.

That being said, I’m proud that this is the first time in the storied 10 year history of the Roundball Oracles that somebody that shares my DNA has been able to hoist the unnamed championship trophy.

Past winners have included co-workers, high school locker partners, former roomies, father-in-laws, and once… even a woman!

So I’m excited this year that somebody with Bennett DNA coursing through their veins will be the reigning Roundball Oracles Champ! All is right in the world.

I know that there is a fair chance that you are wondering: “That is great, but I’d really like to know how some of my other favorite Oracles fared this year. I really root for Russell Kennerly. I like underdogs. He is like the Mid-Major of the Roundball Oracles.”*

So without further adieu, I present to you the final ranking of Year 10 of the Roundball Oracles!

Rank    Oracle Score    Correct    Champion Last Year
1. Brandon Kahler 255 40 Florida 18th
2. Michael Augustin 241 42 Florida 31st
3. Paul Golden 235 41 Michigan State DNP
4. Jordan Toot 228 39 Florida 9th
5. Jon DeWaard 224 39 Florida 5th
6. Mark Wolfram 222 38 Florida 8th
7. Lowell Davis 216 40 Florida DNP
8. Andree Jauhari 210 38 Iowa State 28th
9. Derrick Gorshe 208 38 Iowa State 14th
10. Carrie Baier 205 37 Michigan State 19th
11. Robert Henning 205 36 Florida 10th
12. Bill Wentworth 204 38 Florida 15th
13. Nate Miller 203 36 Iowa State DNP
14. Frank Meiners 201 38 Michigan State 11th
14. Jesse Howard 201 37 Kansas 3rd
16. Corey Faust 200 36 Iowa State 7th
17. Humble Narrator 196 36 Iowa State 33rd
18. William Mcalpine 196 38 Florida 1st
19. Angie DeWaard 191 35 Arizona 6th
20. Sean Clubine 189 36 Syracuse 13th
21. Carla Stensland 189 35 Iowa State DNP
22. Ben Baier 188 35 Arizona 32nd
23. Jackson Faust 185 36 Florida 16th
24. Michelle Haupt 181 35 Arizona 26th
25. Elizabeth Nordeen 181 35 Iowa State 21st
26. Russell Kennerly 180 34 Florida 24th
27. Olivia Baier 178 34 Arizona DNP
28. Jason Baier 175 35 Florida 24th
29. Tim Peterson 175 34 Iowa State 22nd
30. Becky Perkovich 175 35 Iowa State 27th
31. Shawn Lockner 173 33 Wisconsin 4th
32. J.J. Baier 164 24 Michigan 29th
33. Ryan Halvorson 163 33 Arizona 18th
34. Dawn Krause 149 32 Arizona 23rd
35. Will Baier 147 23 Iowa State 34th
36. Sara Lockner 143 28 Florida DNP

 

This year might have been the closest year ever. It literally came down to Wisconsin’s last second shot rimming in and out, giving Kentucky the victory in the Final Four. If that shot drops, Micky wins.

But the shot didn’t fall and Micky waits another year, while Brandon’s name is carved onto the List of Immortals!

Roundball Oracles Champions

2014 – Brandon Kahler
2013 – William McAlpine
2012 – Lowell Davis
2011 – Carrie Baier
2010 – Mark Wolfram
2009 – Mark Wolfram
2008 – Mark Wolfram
2007 – Tim Peterson
2006 – William McAlpine
2005 – William McAlpine

However, there is 1 more bit of business before I let you go about your merry business. In the pre-tournament post I indicated that I might create a travelling trophy. I am not doing that… at least not yet. I did award a trophy for last place this year. It is an experimental tradition. But I may in the future present a last place trophy to the lowest placing adult that gave full effort to win.

This year’s winner…


Sara with her last place trophy.
Sara Lockner… the Best Loser
I am already pumped for next season. I think the Cyclones will be even better next year and if they can make it through the tourney without an injury, I expect to see them in the Final Four next year. So I’ll be seeing you next year in Indianapolis!

*Inside joke that 3 people will get and 1 of them doesn’t even subscribe to this blog!