20 thoughts on “WPC – WEEK 362 – WEEKENDS”

1. Thanks for sending text reminders!

2. Also, your photo is fantastic and I want to know where it is, and the entire story behind it.

3. I should tell you that once a person gets a streak to a certain length, I stop sending reminders. Although, I did send one to Shannon today at 11:07 AM. Her streak should really be history. Shhhh!

   One of these stories is true:

   Story A

   There isn’t much of a story. I like boobs. But not Iowa boobs. So every weekend I drive over to Illinois to take a look at some Illinois boobs. Manage my shock and horror when I got there this weekend and my favorite boob joint was out of business. I was livid. Damn near consolable. Almost got desperate and went back across the river to check out an Iowa boob joint. But instead I just stopped and got ice cream instead.

   Story B

   There isn’t much of a story . I was in Des Moines County working on THE TOWN SIGN PROJECT. In Burlington to be exact. The bridge across the Mississippi into Illinois and I decided to cross it for two reasons. One, I like driving over bridges, I cannot lie. Two, sometimes in river towns they have a town sign when you come off the bridge that is hard to see otherwise. When I got across the bridge the first thing I saw to the north was a town with hardly any businesses in it. Gulfport was the name maybe. You know the mark of a good lie is the details. It looked interesting from a distance. So I drove towards it and saw that it was a strip club. But an abandoned strip club with an awesome sign. I took a couple pictures, without getting out of the car. I was going to get out of the car, but as I was sitting there (texting a picture of it to a friend and asking them if they thought this place might have a good buffet) another car pulled up next to me. They got out and was nosing around the building. I thought about getting out to engage this guy in a conversation, but decided it was just time to get back to the Cyclone State. There were still two more town signs to harvest.

   Story C

   Ever since watching UNDER THE BANNER OF HEAVEN on Hulu I have become a little too interested in Mormon history. There is a lot of it in that area of the country. The Mormon Trail snakes across southern Iowa. Van Buren County is where Brigham Young crossed into Iowa. Across the river from Montrose is Nauvoo, where a cult that used to be in Corning also had a compound. The Mormons also built a giant temple there, but never really used it cause they got run out of town. It was then burned down and rebuilt about 20 years ago. Just across the river a ways from Burlington in Carthage, where Joseph Smith was murdered. But in the town straight across the river from Burlington in the town of Gulfport (possibly) was Bada Bing. The strip club that Joseph Smith frequented when he need to blow off some steam and get away from a hard day dealing with the wives. Being so close to history, I had to make the trip across the river to see it.

   One of those stories is true.

4. I appreciate the advance notice, should I ever reach the tipping point where you stop reminding. I’ll probably mess up my streak again before then on my own.

   Yeah, it’s a real mystery which of those is correct. I don’t know why #1 AND #2 can’t both be true. I don’t see why a guy can’t like town signs AND Illinois boobs; they aren’t mutually exclusive. It could even be fathomable that the whole town sign harvesting project is really just a ploy to get you to the far corners of the state, near enough to state lines to go see various states’ offerings.

5. Story C does have a lot of truth in it though.

   But the problem with your theory about Story A is that we border Missouri and Nebraska. And I am a true patriot of the Cyclone State and would never speak ill of the boobs of this state.

   And I could print up a search that says something like that and make bank selling them at speedways and rodeos all around this state.

   And something I’ve learned on these trips. There are a lot of rodeos in this state. Like an exponential amount of the number I thought there were.

6. Print up shirts…

7. Story C had me with it right up until the “favored strip club” element.

   I assume you could run an entire political campaign on “Is this heaven? No, it’s Iowa boobs” or something like that. And win. Handily. The rodeo circuit is a quality idea – between that and race tracks, you’d clean up.

   I had no idea there were a lot of rodeos. I knew about Dayton’s, and I remember some guys from Ogden who were in another that was closer than that (maybe around Boxholm?). But I figured that was sort of a sport in its twilight. (I also don’t know if that counts or bills itself as a sport, so much as it is just “not dying the best” for several of the events.)

8. Going to the Dayton Rodeo is still the most patriotic thing I’ve ever done in my entire life. I could take a bullet from a commie for a bald eagle and maybe… maybe that would be almost as patriotic as going to the Dayton Rodeo.

   I don’t know of one closer than Dayton, but doesn’t mean it isn’t out there. There is just a ton of them out there. Or at least way more than I knew.

   Rodeo is definitely a geographic sport. There are parts of the country where it is huge. On one of my mission trips we toured the stadium where the Houston Texans play because the head of their turf management was the older brother of one of the kids from the Youth Group. The PBR (I think that is what it is called) is in that stadium for almost an entire month every year. And it sells out every single night. They make more on that rodeo than they do on the NFL games that the stadium was built to house. I think he might have said something like it pays their bills for the entire year. but that might be a false memory. But go Iowa State Turf Management Department! The guy that manages the turf for Houston’s soccer team is also from Iowa State.

   Watching rodeo doesn’t do much for me, except mutton busting. Mutton busting is pretty hilarious.

9. My grandpa Lind used to love the Dayton Rodeo, so we went a fair amount when I was younger, but I don’t think I’ve been since ~2000 or so. Every person in attendance is aggressively proud to be an American!

   Dad’s brother, Curt, lives down in Texas – Seguin, sort of near San Antonio. He lost a thumb doing something at the rodeo that involved a lasso – the thing where you tie together the legs of an animal fast, maybe? His stepson Cory did a lot of it up until he aged out. But the PBR stuff is nuts – we somewhat-ironically went to the one down in Des Moines once (the week before we went to the Scottsdale UGM, whenever that was), and some guy got his ribs crushed when on a bronco, and it was terrifying. You could hear a pin drop in that place. But it was super full here, so I can only imagine how full it would be down in Texas where it is so much more popular. That is incredible that the ISU Turf Mgmt group does so well! It explains why the ISU field always looks top-notch – aren’t we one of only a few remaining power-conference NCAA grass fields? I may be wrong there.

10. I believe it is the best Turf Management program in the country. Not my ranking. Just something I read. They helped with Boone’s field too. I don’t know if they still do, but Boone’s field won an award for best field in the state a few years ago.

    I don’t know if you’ve seen the video about how the grew the field for this year. But it is really cool. I don’t know why anybody would want to play on anything but grass. It really is so much better and safer. But obviously way more work.

11. I think I remember hearing that on a football game once? I have a buddy who graduated from it and maintained the ISU golf course for a long time, as well as working on the course. He is super talented.

    I will have to find that video! I didn’t know that they helped Boone, that is great!

    Can I take a minute to say how banal the name Ledges Elementary is? Lost Lake, Pea’s Creek – they would have been less on-the-nose and more creative.

12. 
    
    

    They grew two fields on some farm. Then moved it.

    I didn’t even know that Boone had picked a name for the new school. At least 50 years from now we won’t find out that the school was named after a raging homophobe or something of that ilk.

13. That is even more interesting that they transported it.

    Touché. That is much better than some of the very possible options I could have seen thrown out.

14. Actually this is the original video that I saw:

    https://fb.watch/f8F5WswKec/

15. That is impressive – and is definitely unique to our area, you couldn’t have great turf management in Arizona. That is fascinating.

16. Speaking of Arizona…

    After this next round of expansion ends, what would you like the Big 12 to look like?

17. Good question. So, only looking at PAC-12, since they’re gonna fall apart here.

    1. I don’t want Colorado back, although they make sense geographically. You dumped us on the way to the prom, you can find some crap-ass D2 conference. I will hold a grudge forever.

    2. The first team I want are the Ducks, for a few reasons:
    a) They have an awesome sense of style, and I think they have a sense of humor.
    b) My mom’s brother lives in Eugene, so we’d have somewhere to stay (and vice versa) when we go to away games.

    3. As much as I understand the people who were all, “Texas/Oklahoma should have never left,” the fact remains that we needed them more than they needed us. They brought in a ton of income, # of viewers, and strength of schedule. Ideally, USC (who I despise) and probably Arizona would fill that void.

    Of the others, I have always thought Stanford would be fun because their mascot is a freaking tree, and I’ve been to Arizona State games and have family in Phoenix, so I’d also be fine with that.

    I’m not against anyone else, but that’s my power ranking. The biggest problem is that now the conference spans from West VA to CA – which isn’t a huge problem in this day and age, but I think we could shed the Mountaineers (who I do enjoy) to accommodate the others.

    How about you?

18. (Also Stanford has $$ and academics, but I was being vaguely pithy.)

19. We are kind of on opposite ends of the spectrum. I’d start by saying there is no way we could get USC since they aren’t passing up Big Ten money to join us.

    Where we vary the largest though is this is how I would rank the schools.

    List One includes schools I don’t think we can get. Adding just 4 schools in my scenarios.

    1. Colorado
    2. Oregon
    3. Washington
    4. Stanford

    List Two – Schools I think we could get:

    1. Colorado
    2. Arizona
    3. Arizona State
    4. San Diego State

    In a perfect world where I could cobble together a conference for Iowa State, I would bring back all the former Big 8 Schools. Keep Texas Tech and let’s say Cincinnati.

    I know the 10 team conference is a thing of the past, but I think it is actually the perfect size for a conference. Play everybody in football. Play everybody twice in basketball.

    I do miss playing Missouri and Nebraska. I will miss Oklahoma. I absolutely will not miss Texas. I do not miss Texas A&M at all. I think it is funny that they are stuck with each other again.

    Utah is school I most want to give the bird to. Had nothing against them before this round of realignment, but they really have the absolute worst fans. We already have BYU (which I’m not crazy about cause frankly I don’t like having private schools in the conference. See Baylor and TCU) so I don’t know what they add. Other than just the most arrogant out of touch with reality fans ever. Worse than Nebraska and Iowa fans.

    I also don’t know what adding both Arizona and Arizona State would bring. But both are better options than Oregon State and Washington State. I feel terrible for those schools. Their fans are going what we went through twice, but I don’t think they will get lucky and get a lifeline. But if I was adding teams based entirely on nicknames, it would be this four:

    1. Oregon State Beavers
    2. San Diego State Aztecs
    3. Arizona State Sun Devils
    4. Oregon Ducks

    I would love to have Oregon and Washington, but I think they will always be looking for that Big Ten invite and I think that destabilizes the conference. Bringing back a historic Iowa State rival is my number one hope though.

    I don’t hold a grudge against them because they did what was smart for them at the time.

20. OK, so I definitely did not account for who would accept our invite or not in mine – mine was sort of just an “ideal situation” scenario. I know USC and UCLA are already set for Big 10, logically.

    I think you are correct, Oregon and Washington are likely also going to more prosperous conferences, which is dumb but whatever. I could see them both joining for a minute and then leaving, or trying to somehow get into the ACC or similar. As an aside, I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if the likes of Alabama, Ohio State, Texas, Georgia, Michigan, Notre Dame, etc. just make a super-conference eventually and demolish the whole Power 5 (almost 4) system we’ve got. My only hope in that instance is that Iowa doesn’t get in and is devastated (again, spite). All of this restructuring seems like it’s just constantly pulling us closer to the haves and have-nots/lesses.

    Anyway, back on topic to what I think will practically happen. I do think we’ll probably end up with Colorado, because it makes sense on multiple levels – I just have a bit of a grudge there (although nowhere as much as I dislike Nebraska for multiple reasons – mostly their undeserved arrogance at this point). That seems the most logical get to me.

    Of the practical choices left after the defections, my best-case for the actual conference is:
    1. Colorado
    2. Arizona
    3. SDSU
    4. Cal

    I don’t think we’ll probably get Cal or SDSU; I think we’ll instead get AZ State and freaking Utah. I don’t know if there would be enough of a rivalry between Arizona State and Arizona to bring in revenue? It makes sense to have those rivalry games out-of-conference to not throw away those games financially, so I’d also prefer not to have them both in the conference.

    If this happens, I still feel like we’re not making up as much of the money as would be ideal from losing TX/OK. (I also loathe Texas, but man do they rake it in.)

    I think the old Big 8 was great in terms of traveling to games – we’re a team who travels well, and when everyone was closer geographically, that strengthened us there. I like Cal and SDSU because they’re easier to get to by plane than some of the others, so that sort of compensates for some of it. I don’t even know how many airports Utah has (I know SLC, but not of any other major ones), and I wouldn’t want to go there, anyway.

    That was a ramble. Sorry about that.

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