I had a pretty awesome Memorial Day Weekend and saw all of the right people. Plus, my grill got quite the workout.

The weekend started with FNSC at my humble abode. The group core was there, plus Jesse and Dawn. Jesse, Willy and I hung by the fire pit until about 2 in the morning.

On Saturday morning I got up early to go to the bank with Mom and Teresa to sign some legal documents involving a safety deposit box.

After that exercise I hit up Salon 908 where I put up a new 20×30 picture in the salon to replace the one that had been sold. While you are waiting for a haircut at Salon 908 now you can stare admiringly at this picture:

I also got a sheering. Now I look borderline presentable. Even though I declined the eyebrow waxing that was offered.

I went home to clean up the kitchen best that I could. I had a Chef coming over to use it that afternoon and while I know that he looks down on my pathetic assortment of kitchen utensils, I wanted the area to be clean while he made magic.

After the kitchen cleaning, I went to Reiman’s Music to take pictures of a white piano for that week’s RWPE.

Next was a trip down to Beaverdale to pick up Sara. Although the Sara pickup also involved taking out her old air conditioner and putting a new air conditioner in her house. This ended up being a more painful process than I wanted it to be, but despite having to remove a nest from her window sill, the air condition finally found its home in her window.

Then was Todd and Peggy’s wedding. They got married on a golf course in Pleasant Hill. It was an impressive affair that included a free round of miniature golf, a photo booth and fireworks.

After the wedding Sara and I went to a bridge overlooking 235 so that I could work on a Personal Photo Project that will be published on July 9. It was from this experience I learned that another criteria that I should look for in photo assistants is the ability to turn a blind eye if I want to do something that is slightly illegal or dangerous. Sara doesn’t like it when she perceives me to be in “danger”. Of course, I already knew this from Personal Photo Project No. 16.

After dropping Sara back off in Beaverdale and doing some final tweaks on her air conditioner installation I voyaged back to Boone. A trip that takes quite a bit longer now that the Highway 17 bridge over the Des Moines River is closed until August.

I was hoping to make it back to Boone to hit the tail end of Nate’s birthday bash at The South Side, marking my triumphant return to the Boone Bar scene for the first time since 2008. However, I pulled back into Boone at roughly 1:40 and decided that it wasn’t worth it to go for 5 minutes. So instead I returned home to the Clockwork Couch and watched the tele.

Shortly after I got home Nate and Bethany returned home. They were both staying with me for the weekend and we talked briefly before they both crashed.

I got up early on Sunday morning and went to church. After church I grilled out with Nate after he returned from a poor round of golf with his friend Ryan. Earlier in the morning I had inadvertently interrupted Ryan’s vomiting efforts. It must have been quite the party that I missed.

Tim had bought a Nate a birthday cake with Nate’s 3rd or 4th grade picture on it. Most of Nate’s picture remained, except Nate’s face. Apparently Ryan had eaten Nate’s face the night before. After we were done grilling, I had some of Nate’s cake.

Later Nate proclaimed that the chicken wings he had made in my kitchen on the previous day were the best that he had ever made. This was a bold proclamation. Just ask Corey Faust if you doubt the veracity of that statement. Nate is going to make these legendary wings next time I go to Minnesota. Looks like I might have to cash in on that when I go see The Swell Season at the end of July!!

After resting from the grill, Jill came over and picked me up. We hit Jen and Derrick’s for a barbecue. Derrick grilled up bratwurst with pineapple in them. It was decided that these brats tasted slightly breakfasty. Even though Webster doesn’t consider breakfasty to be a word. They were still tasty. Plus any chance to eat burgers made with Derrick’s super secret burger recipe is always a great time.

I got to watch the Gorshe Baby Ultrasound for the third time. I still have no clue about the sex of Baby Gorshe, but I enjoy watching the video nonetheless.

After a lengthy discussion about the greatness of Daniel Tosh, we left while Derrick napped on the loveseat.

The next morning I slept in until 9:30. That is a late morning for me, except on the occasional work day. Nate, Bethany and I grilled out for lunch. By this time, my grill was definitely entering the danger area that cause the fire during the 2009 Road Trip Planning Barbecue, but it made it through another meal without incident.

After the meal Nate and Bethany packed up and I burned Bethany a copy of Strict Joy for their car trip home.

I then grabbed my camera and took a few pictures.

After taking pictures I went to the cemetery. At the cemetery I ran into Carla. We walked around the cemetery for about an hour. Then I went home and prepared the house for an impromptu family barbecue.

I didn’t clean the grill, but it did manage to make it through yet one more meal without erupting into flames. I should clean that at some point.

After the family went home I rested on the Clockwork Couch and watched Wooden Shoes. A movie made my a fellow computer miner by the name of Scotland Thompson. If you want a review of the movie, too bad, but I will loan my copy out.

I would like to report to interested parties that do not know yet…

Willy did finish his 100 Mile Race this past weekend.

Willy knocked out 100 miles in La Grange, Wisconsin as part of the weekend of Kettle 100 Endurance Runs.

He ran 100 miles in an official time of 28 hours 24 minutes 29 seconds.

I know, pretty insane!

I was dreadfully unprepared for this year’s Halloween. Including not buying pumpkins and candy until Saturday morning, not running firmware updates on my Blu-Ray player until Saturday night and not doing any decorating at all. Truth is that the lack of decorating was a conscious decision that I plan on repeating for Thanksgiving and Christmas. Although I have a feeling that a Christmas tree is going to show up in my house when I am not home.

Although if I do ending up holding a Friendsmas-Thanksmas-Christgiving celebration between Thanksgiving and Christmas, it is possible that a small amount of decorating might transpire. But that is a pretty big if at this point in time. Mostly because I still need to convince myself that I won’t blow up the house while frying a turkey.

Despite the lack of preparation, Halloween went just fine.

I ended up with 46 trick-or-treaters. I think I would have been able to breach 60, but Jay turned off the light for about 15 minutes, causing a loss of who knows how many trick-or-treaters.

Despite getting a couple of garbage pumpkins, Jay still made two spectacular jack-o-lanterns.

A few pictures from the night…

Jay cleaning out a pumpkin.

The Davis Family. Holden was awesome in the respect that after every picture, he would come over and want to see it. Good thing I wasn’t using film.

Austin was not a fan of the hood part of his sweet giraffe costume.

Holden was a big fan of my front stoop. If he makes it to my birthday barbecue next year, I anticipate I will find him sitting in that exact spot on multiple occasions.

Austin was happier without the hood.

A Howard paying homage to a CBS television show?!?!? Shocker! Saydie is not wearing a wig. Taylan as Laura Ingalls Wilder.

Jay working on a pumpkin for my mom.

Jay’s 2009 Masterpiece!

I think I will have to schedule my social calendar lightly next October, so I can get into the spirit of things and maybe even visit a pumpkin patch. I didn’t get a chance to do that this year.

When I posted the picture below, I promised more information on Alligator Shirt Day.

Jill on the day that Alligator Shirt Day was invented.

The truth is that it isn’t much of a story.

A couple of years ago my mom went to Florida to visit some family. Of all of the places that they visited, I think that her favorite was St. Augustine. While she was in St. Augustine, she picked me up a souvenir. A black t-shirt with an alligator on its front.

If you can claim to know me at all, you know I am a fan of alligators. You also know that I have a severe weakness for monster movies.

When I was a small child I watched a movie called Alligator. Very few movies have influenced the man that I have become like Alligator. (Shaft, Beyond the Valley of the Dolls, Cannibal Ferox, Zardoz, Smokey and the Bandit, Every Which Way But Loose and The Duel to name a few.)

The basic premise of Alligator is that a little kid gets a baby alligator as a pet at a fair of some kind. The kid’s dad is a big jerk and flushes the baby gator down the toilet. The baby alligator lives in the sewers of a major city. Then after 20 years the gator busts through a city street and crashes a wedding among other venues. It is basically Jaws with an alligator instead of a shark. It is not anywhere as well made, but that is part of its charm.

I watched this movie with my dad when we still lived on West 15th Street.

When we lived on West 15th Street, we had an aquarium in the kitchen. Well, where else would you put an aquarium?

Occasionally we would put newts in this aquarium. The interesting thing about newts is that they have no problem escaping aquariums. This freaked my mom out.

Although I have my doubts that she watched very much of Alligator, it left enough of an impression on her that she was always worried that these escaped newts were living under the house (it didn’t really have a basement, more of a cellar) and growing to monstrous proportions.

Maybe this is where you can measure the greatest distance between me and my mom. She was afraid that there were giant newts living in our cellar. I was hoping that there were giant newts living in our cellar.

That house isn’t there any longer and I never read any newspaper article claiming that giant newts went on a rampage in west Boone after being discovered under a demolished house.

Although the odds are against it, I like to think that the giant newts moved on after we moved out and are living in the woods just outside of Boone. Waiting. Just waiting.

I never wear the alligator shirt. Perhaps it is because when you have something that cherry, you live in a constant fear that if you take the shirt out of the closet something bad will happen to it. A sweet and sour sauce accident at Chinese Homestyle Cooking. A barbecue sauce accident at Battle’s. A bloomin’ onion sauce accident at Wallaby’s.

This brings me to the day of the picture above.

Jill and I were going to go cruising around in her car. But as it turned out it rained that day. This sudden unexpected rainfall was caused by Jill washing her car. She has those kind of powers. We still cruised the car, but with the top up.

We ended up at Jen and Derrick’s.

While we were conversing with Derrick, Jill brought up that their dad had brought her back 3 new shirts from his latest Boy Scout camping trip. 1 of these shirts had an alligator on it. She seemed less than impressed with this shirt.

I brought up the fact that I also had an awesome alligator shirt, but I never have a special enough occasion to wear it.

We struck a deal that we would declare one of the days of next year’s The Road Trip to be Alligator Shirt Day and we would wear our shirts.

When I returned home that evening I looked through my closet and found my alligator shirt. I looked at it and thought, “You will get to leave the closet in about one more year.”

A couple of days later I was wandering the shafts of the Computer Mine, when I ran into Coreen. She was sporting a shirt with a crocodile on it that came from the Vacation Bible School that she ran this Summer.

I commented on how I admired her crocodile shirt and I told her about my alligator shirt and the deal that Jill and I had brokered.

She pointed out that if I wore my shirt to work, she would also wear her shirt and we could have Alligator Shirt Day at work.

It seemed like a magnificent idea. So magnificent we had our picture taken to remember the day.

Alligator Shirt Day was such a success that Coreen and I decided to declare September 2 to forever be Alligator Shirt Day. In fact, if there is a 2010 Photography 139 Calendar, you can bet dollars to donuts that when you flip to September, you will see Alligator Shirt Day staring back at you on the 2nd.

I don’t know that this new holiday that I have invented will take off, but I have a good feeling about it.

Plus, how great is 2010 going to be? There will be not 1, but 2 Alligator Shirt Days!!

By the way, this is journal entry #2 of 5 that are about groups I am in that have matching shirts. The Knocker Walkers, The Alligator Shirt People…

I hate to go back to touch base with Christmas, but I should point out that I got many a sweet Christmas present. I don’t want to talk about any of them because I don’t wish to make any of you jealous, with one exception.

My sister Teresa crocheted me a sweet cardinal and gold ISU scarf.

It is almost too sweet of a scarf to wear.

On New Year’s Day, between the Outback Bowl and the Rose Bowl, I went over to check out the ACTORS building in Ames with Becky, Terra and Geri. Geri is actually the President or Chairman of ACTORS.

Some pictures.

Geri

Shoes

Becky & Terra

Rubber Chicken

Ham

Geri and I

Dressing Room

It was an interesting experience.

I thought about waxing philosophical on how indifferent I am to New Year’s Eve and all of it trappings, but as it turns out I’m to apathetic to even write about it.

However, I am now intrigued by the concept of waxing philosophical. I know this is an old timey phrase that dates back to when the word wax mostly meant to grow. Such as a waxing moon. As opposed to a waning moon.

But, I still want to invent a product called Philosopher’s Wax. I’m quite certain that it could be used on both a convertible and a finely groomed mustache. A mustache like that kid at Subway has that Willy admires from a distance.

I’m told that New Year’s is a time for new beginnings, but it seems to me that to arbitrarily wait for one certain point in Earth’s orbit around the sun to make drastic or necessary changes in one’s life is silly, but not in a good way like the putty. Make those changes when you realize they need to be made and one certainly shouldn’t wait an entire year to reflect on their life.

So to New Year’s and all of its trappings, I say “Bah! It is a humbug!” Besides the time with family and friends. The day off from work. All the good food and football.

I thought I would throw out the picture for September while I was at it.

This is a picture of a moonflower.

As you may know, Building 429 is one of my favorite bands. This year they released a new albums and thus one of my new favorite songs. Here in the Christmas season I felt it was necessary to share the lyrics to the song Always.

Always
I was standing in the pouring rain one dark November night
Fighting off the bitter cold when she caught my eye
Her face was taught and her eyes were filled, and to my surprise
She pulled out a photograph and my heart just stopped inside
She said, “He would’ve been three today
I miss his smile, I miss his face”
What was I supposed to say, but

CHORUS
I believe always, always
Our Savior never fails
Even when all hope is gone
God knows our pain and his promise remains
He will be with you always

He was living in a broken world, dreaming of a home
His heart was barely keeping pace when I found him all alone
Remembering the way he felt when his daddy said goodbye
Fighting just to keep the tears and the anger locked inside
He’s barely holding onto faith
But deliverance is on its way, cause

CHORUS
I believe always, always
Our Savior never fails
Even when all hope is gone
God knows our pain and his promise remains
He will be with you always

Friend, I don’t know where you are and I don’t know where you’ve been
Maybe you’re fighting for your life or just about to throw the towel in
But if you’re crying out for mercy, if there’s no hope left at all
If you’ve given everything you’ve got and you’re still about to fall
Well hold on, hold on, hold on, cause
I believe always, always
Our savior never fails
Even when all faith is gone
God knows our pain and his promise remains
Always, always, He will be with you always

I got a call from Jen on Saturday. She told me that some of her Uncle’s neighbors in Ottumwa had complained about the dumpster that was sitting in front of the house.

The neighbors understood why it was there, but wanted it removed until after Christmas.

Derrick and Jen were not about to move the dumpster. They had paid one rate to keep the dumpster as long as it is needed. To have it removed and brought back would cost them a pretty penny. A very pretty penny.

So they did what anybody else would do.

I got these pictures sent to my phone on Sunday night.

So let this be a lesson to you. You mess with the Gorshes and they just might taunt you with their Christmas decorating.

I started Thanksgiving by helping serve the free Thanksgiving dinner with my Mom, Teresa and Logan. I was given the extremely important duty of collecting trays.

After my shift concluded I talked dogs with Karma’s former vet Jordan and his family. Even though I know when I get a dog again it will be a Golden Retriever, I was told by one of Jordan’s daughters to look into Bulgarian Mountain Dogs.

I really had no intention of doing this, but I was told (incorrectly) that I would be a hypocrite if I didn’t do such a thing.

So enjoy this little tidbit from Wikipedia about Bulgarian Mountain Dogs (AKA Caucasian Shepherd Dog):

Powerful and massive, the Caucasian Ovcharka can be a difficult breed for an inexperienced owner, because it respects and obeys only those that it deems superior to itself. They are good with children, but will not see them as their masters. The dog develops a strong bond with its owner but will rarely be submissive; this is truly a thinking dog which relies on its own instincts, sometimes even disregarding its master’s directions. A breed with a very quick reaction time and fast protection reflexes, it has even been unfairly described by some as somewhat of a “loose cannon”. With proper care, handling and training, this is a well-behaved and obedient family companion.

I have no doubt that such a dog would see me as being superior, but Golden Retrievers are where it is at.

I concluded my Thanksgiving by eating a wonderful dinner and dominating my family in Rack Rummy.

Here are some pictures from the day.

If you break it down, I had 6 Thanksgiving to attend this week. That is a lot of good and unhealthy eating.

Teresa’s latest project was too make individualized Christmas booklets for all the members of the family. Well, not for me, but for the other members of the family.

I spent a fair amount of Thanksgiving trying to explain that I don’t really care what I get for Christmas. I’m the easiest person in the world to shop for because I like everything and I get too much as it is.

But the actual truth is that what I would really like for Christmas is to find somebody that can challenge me at the game of Rack Rummy.