HP Laserjet 4100

I’ve learned a few things toiling in the computer mine. The most valuable bit of new knowledge I have gained is how completely worthless UPS is as a shipper. I’ve learned that if you have an option other than UPS, be it Federal Express, DHL, Speedee Delivery, or a crackhead with a mule, you are better off with the crackhead and their mule than trusting anything with the boys in brown.

The most recent thing that UPS has managed to smash into little tiny bits was an HP Laserjet 4100. No small feat considering that this printer is mostly made out of metal. No cheap feat either considering that this printer used to damage a guy’s wallet to the tune of a thousand bucks.

The latest destruction by UPS did allow me to test myself. You see back when I used to work nights at the Dasher Mismanagement dive in Boone I was the master of Milk Crate Toss. I could throw a milk crate into the corral from 70 feet, easy. Nobody could top me for distance and accuracy.

This skill has not come into play much in the last few years, but once I got my hands on that LJ 4100 I knew I needed to see if I still had it. I had Jesse snap some photos of me testing me. It was dark, so these pictures are what they are:


10-31-07

10-31-07

10-31-07

10-31-07

10-31-07

10-31-07

It makes me wonder how I would still fair in events where I was competitive but not dominant. Events like Jug Kicking, Ditch Hockey or Playplace Tag. I already know that if Jeff Vickers and I were ever to walk onto a Paper Towel Football field we would still dominate the competition.

I’m sure I would be remiss if I failed to point out that my near infinite range with the milk crate did lead me to once hitting The Edge in the head with a milk crate from about 50 feet. Although I felt bad and did take him to the emergency room to have staples put in his head, I still have to admire the throw.

BSVRR!

I mentioned that I was going to celebrate the peak of fall colors with a little train ride. The pictures from the train ride are now posted. Just follow the link below:

BOONE & SCENIC VALLEY RAILROAD

It was a very overcast and dark day. That meant a large aperture and slow shutter speed, which is the worst possible combination for landscape pictures from a moving object. Hopefully you will still get the idea.

I’m Vi Woodcock

One last Kubrick reference for the week and for the people that aren’t sick of Kubrick yet*. I feel when discussing retirement or of quitting a job that one loathes the movie most apropos would be Spartacus. When I had a job I hated I often dreamed of leading my own slave rebellion. A Wage Slave Rebellion. I never got the chance to lead my own rebellion, (even though I am technically still a wage slave) but I do still take the time to enjoy and celebrate when somebody that is dear to me leaves a job they despise. My joy is doubled when their freedom also weakens the evil empire known as Dasher Mismanagement. My joy is tripled when that person is retiring.

This morning I got the joy of attending a retirement party for Vi on her last day chained to the oar at work. It is a great and wonderful day and I look forward to discussing the many things that Vi is getting to do with her new freedom at church on Sundays rather than trying to talk her into retiring. This leaves only a couple of people left that I would like to see escape the demon clutches of Dasher Mismanagement.

Below is a picture of Jay, Vi, and I at the retirement shindig.


10-25-07

I have not imbibed a single morsel of food from a Dasher Mismanagement dive in over 18 months. I confess that I was tempted today to have some milk from their cooler. I looked at it and considered it (because I did not pay for it – I haven’t give them one red cent of my money in years) but in the end I just threw it away. (They still lost about 20 cents by my throwing it away. A little victory.) I did not want their poisons flowing into this temple.

*Warner Bros. did release new versions of Lolita and Barry Lyndon on Tuesday. However, since neither one was anamorphic I can’t quite figure out why they wasted their time. I will not be purchasing these “new” versions. Who am I kidding? It is 50-50 on whether or not I buy them. The fact that they aren’t in snap cases might be motivation enough.

Oklahoma

“It had been a wonderful evening and what I needed now, to give it the perfect ending, was a little of the Ludwig Von.”
– Alex DeLarge (A Clockwork Orange)

If all things are relative, the loss to Oklahoma on Saturday felt like a win since it was an incredible improvement over the Texas game. I have to admit to feeling pretty good when I left Jack Trice. I did not listen to Beethoven on Saturday night though. I mostly sat around thinking about how I left some necessary documents at work and then fell asleep.

Unfortunately, there are no moral victories. Iowa State did lose. My Beethoven CDs still collect dust. I did however get the pictures from the game up on the website moments ago.

Iowa State Cyclones vs. Oklahoma Sooners

Fuzzy Warbles

“What you got back home, little sister, to play your fuzzy warbles on? I bet you got, say, pitiful, portable picnic players. Come with uncle and hear all proper! Hear angels’ trumpets and devils’ trombones. You are invited!”
– Alex DeLarge (A Clockwork Orange)>

If you are a lover of high quality music, angel trumpets, and/or devil trombones then I have some good news for you. The Boone Big Band is going to be having a show this Saturday. Don’t take my word for it, read the following blurb I stole from their invite that I’m now trying to regurgitate as if it was a press release. I learned that trick from the fine reporters at the Boone News Republican.

The Big Band of Boone will be performing at their annual autumn Hangar Dance on October 27th, 2007 at 7 p.m. in Boone, Iowa.

Many members of the Big Band also perform each summer with the Boone Municipal Band and are either current or former music educators or professional musicians. Big Band members Connie Younger and Paul Navara recruited 18 other talented central-Iowa musicians from Ames, Ankeny, Boone, Madrid, Ogden, Osceola, Renwick, and Stanhope to participate. The band’s repertoire includes classic 40s and 50s era big band music as well as contemporary arrangements of well-known hits.

Big Band members include the following:
Saxophone Section: Connie Younger, Dick Humeston, Laura Britton, Christine Heintz, and Joel Jacobson.

Trumpet Section: Bill Martin, Dan Sprengler, Deidre Malmquist, Linda Younger, Jo Howell, and Steve Weigel.

Trombone Section: Dave Richardson, Larry Moeller, Dale Schoening, Lowell Davis, and Ted Erickson.

Rhythm Section: David Howell on Piano, Dave Swenson on Bass, Mark Astleford on Guitar, and Paul Navara on Drums.

The Hangar Dance will be held on Saturday, October 27th, 2007 at the Boone Municipal Airport in Boone. CY Aviation is co-hosting the event with the Boone Area Pilots Association. Dancing and music begin at 7:00 pm. Seasonal snacks and beverages will be provided and pop will be available for purchase. Dancers and music lovers of all ages are invited to attend. Admission is $10 per person and tickets are available at the door.

When: Saturday Oct 27, 2007
7:00 PM

Where: Boone Municipal Airport
BOONE, IA 50036
The United States of America

Now I haven’t decide whether or not I’m going to attend, but if YOU’RE not there, I’m not even going to bother. Or will I?

The Third Crack

“Oh bliss! Bliss and heaven! Oh, it was gorgeousness and gorgeousity made flesh. It was like a bird of rarest-spun heaven metal or like silvery wine flowing in a spaceship, gravity all nonsense now. As I slooshied, I knew such lovely pictures!”

– Alex DeLarge (A Clockwork Orange)

I might have written that a few weeks back that a certain Tuesday was the greatest New Release Tuesday of the year. When I wrote that remark it was true. However, today’s New Release Tuesday has eclipsed that previous greatest day. What was released today to set a new high water mark? Today is the day that the Stanley Kubrick boxed set was released.

I do own all of the Kubrick movies on DVD already (except for Fear and Desire* which is unavailable in any format), but when his Warner Bros. movies were released a few years back the job that was done on the movies was sub-par at best. The transfers were not cleaned up in the slightest bit. The transfers were not anamorphic. The soundtracks were mono. There wasn’t an extra feature to be found on any disc. To cap off the indignity, since most of these discs were released by Warner Bros. the discs were housed in their terrible cardboard boxes.

I could deal with the lame boxes and the dearth of special features. I could handle the soundtracks being mono because Kubrick released his movies with mono soundtracks. (Not because he feared surround sound soundtracks, but because he did not trust the sound systems of most theaters to divide the tracks properly so he released his movies in mono because they would sound good even on the worst theater’s sound system.) The fact that the pictures were not anamorphic was tolerable because I did (and do not) have a television where such a thing would be painfully evident. However, the wretched state of the transfers was sickening. The scratches and the marks. The loss of color. It makes me nauseous thinking about it right now.

Warner Bros. has tried to atone for their past sins by releasing 5 of Kubrick’s last 6 movies. Curiously absent from this boxed set is Barry Lyndon. Perhaps not so curious since nobody loves that movie. The new boxed set is anamorphic, has 5.1 soundtracks, 4 out of 5 are are 2 disc special editions, and are in real cases. What about the transfers?

As I sit typing this entry out, I have cracked into the A CLOCKWORK ORANGE disc. It is easily the best transfer of this movie I’ve ever seen. The video is pristine and the colors are wonderful. I can’t wait to crack into 2001: A Space Odyssey, Full Metal Jacket, Eyes Wide Shut, and The Shining. I’m also excited to watch the documentary about Kubrick included in the boxed set.

My hope is that some other studios (and Warner Bros. because they still own the rights to some of his other movies) release some very good DVDs of his other movies. As of right now there are really only passable DVDs of Spartacus and Dr. Strangelove. I would definitely like to see improved versions of one of my personal favorites Paths of Glory, Lolita, and even the much maligned Barry Lyndon. I can handle the current versions of The Killing and Killer’s Kiss, but I wouldn’t mind seeing better versions of those movies as well. I guess I’ll have to wait and see what happens.

To sum up my feelings about the new boxed set in terms that Alex DeLarge would understand, “It makes me feel real horrorshow!”

Enough about Kubrick, below are some pictures from Saturday.


10-20-07B


10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

10-20-07B

This was thought to be a lost film, and one researcher, Mark Carducci, had suggested that Kubrick destroyed the negative following the death of Joseph Burstyn, the film’s distributor. Bootleg copies abound, however, and there is one (legal) print in all of the Americas. It is located in the Kodak archives in Rochester, New York; the Kubrick estate allows viewing of the film with the provisos that it is screened by individuals (not groups), that the print never leaves the building in which it is housed, and that it cannot be duplicated in whole or in part.