These negatives are in pretty bad shape, so take this for what it is worth.
Slice of Life Vol. 33
Monthly Archives: January 2011
Movie Review: The Dilemma
Movie – The Dilemma
Director: Ron Howard (Backdraft, Apollo 13, A Beautiful Mind, Cinderella Man, Frost/Nixon)
Writer: Allan Loeb (Things We Lost in the Fire, 21, The Switch)
Starring: Vince Vaughn (Wedding Crashers, Dodgeball, Old School, Swingers), Kevin James (I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry, Hitch, Paul Blart: Mall Cop), Winona Ryder (Heathers, Girl, Interrupted, Dracula) and Jennifer Connelly (Requiem for a Dream, A Beautiful Mind, Blood Diamond)
Theater – Cinemark Movies 12 – Ames, Iowa
Companion – Nader
Food – King Buffet
Intellectual Honesty
I’ve been a big fan of Winona Ryder since Heathers, (one of my all-time favorite movies) but it doesn’t seem like she has gotten many great roles lately. She was in Black Swan, but she seemed slightly out of place. Ditto for Jennifer Connelly. I know these won’t be great roles, but at least it is something.
Baggage
Oh Vince Vaughn, I wish we could just go back to Swingers and start all over again. Kevin James’ stand up comedy is hilarious, but his movies have been absolutely awful, with the exception of Hitch. He owes me a written apology for my sitting through Paul Blart: Mall Cop, perhaps the worst movie of 2009.
I’m not sure how Ron Howard became attached to this movie. My best guess is that he was feeling nostalgic for his early days of Night Shift, Splash and Gung Ho. I would think that the director of Apollo 13, Ransom, Frost/Nixon and A Beautiful Mind would pursue a more demanding project, but then I remember he also made Edtv, The Da Vinci Code and How the Grinch Stole Christmas.
Synopsis from IMDB
A man finds out that what you don’t say to a friend is just as important as what you do is this story of how far you can bend a brotherly bond before it snaps. Since college, confirmed bachelor Ronny (Vaughn) and happily married Nick (James) have been through thick and thin. Now partners in an auto design firm, the two pals are vying to land a dream project that would launch their company. Ronny’s girlfriend, Beth (Connelly), and Nick’s wife, Geneva (Ryder), are by their sides. But Ronny’s world is turned upside down when he inadvertently sees Geneva out with another man and makes it his mission to get answers. As the amateur investigation dissolves into mayhem, he learns that Nick has a few secrets of his own. Now, with the clock ticking and pressure mounting on the biggest presentation of their careers, Ronny must decide what will happen if he reveals the truth to his best friend.
Review
The surprise of this movie is that the best role and only performance worth noting is Winona Ryder’s turn as the cheating wife. Amazingly her character ends up being extremely likable and while you hate her for what she is doing, she is still intelligent, interesting and has a level of depth missing from every other character in the movie.
Kevin James is a little hard to believe as an auto-engineering genius. He plays the straight man and while Paul Blart proved that he doesn’t belong as the leading man in a movie, he is much better as the goofy friend like in Hitch than as the friend of the goofy guy.
Vince Vaughn plays the exact same role he has played in every movie and he plays it well, but at some point I hope to seem him cover some new ground. At least the character is likable in this role, unlike Wedding Crashers or The Break-up.
Connelly is completed wasted in this role. She plays Vaughn’s girlfriend struggling to trust him due to his gambling addiction. However, this is never really explored and seems to be mentioned as little more than a plot device.
Channing Tatum was surprisingly interesting as Zip, the man that Ryder was having an affair with. Surprisingly, I wanted him in the movie more. His character was legitimately funny.
Not legitimately funny but just flat out puzzling is Queen Latifah. I think her character existed only to remind the audience that on top of the dilemma Vaugn’s Ronny was facing, he and James’ Nick need to produce an electric motor that sounds and shakes a car like a muscle car from the 70s. Why anybody would be interested in such a product, I don’t know. Apparently the filmmakers felt it was necessary to try to make her “funny” by repeatedly saying “woman wood”, but it wasn’t funny.
Of course, that is really the main problem with this movie. According to the Internet Movie Database, this movie is both a comedy and a drama. Well, it tries to be a comedy but feels like a drama.
It isn’t completely devoid of humor though. It isn’t laughless like Grown Ups. In fact, the scene where Ronny gives a toast to a couple married for 40 years is one of the funnier scenes of the year, but the laughs are few and far between for the rest of the movie.
It wasn’t a bad movie, but it felt like wasted potential. It wasted the talents of Ron Howard, Winona Ryder and Jennifer Connelly. Even though Ryder is definitely the highlight of the movie.
I think a better ending might have gotten an extra half star out of me.
Rating
2.5/5.0 Caramels
Buy on DVD
No, but I’m reminded that I should see if Heathers is on Blu-Ray. I would watch this movie again on cable.
2011 Ranking
As the first 2011 movie I’ve seen, it currently ranks #1. I hope it doesn’t hold it for very long.
Bonus Information
Since the Cinemark refuses to bring any movies of merit to Ames, next week Nader and I are going down to The Fleur to see The King’s Speech and I will introduce Nader to the greatness that is Ted’s Coney Island.
I’m sick of seeing advertisements for Sucker Punch. I’m intrigued by Hall Pass. I don’t know what to think of Your Higness. Might be an early contender for worst movie of 2011 (with Sucker Punch and Just Go with It), but it might also be brilliant.
There was a certain amount of controversy about the use of the word “gay” in The Dilemma. To know what I think about that controversy read The Toad, The Turtle, and the Duck in David Sedaris’ “clever” Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk: A Modest Beastiary.
One other note, Raging Bull came out on Blu-Ray on Tuesday. If you haven’t already, you should run to buy it.
Movie Review: Country Strong
Movie – Country Strong
Director: Shana Feste (The Greatest)
Writer: Shana Feste (The Greatest)
Starring: Gwyneth Paltrow (Se7en, The Talented Mr. Ripley, The Royal Tenenbaums), Tim McGraw (The Blind Side, Flicka), Garrett Hedlund (Troy, Four Brothers, Tron: Legacy), and Leighton Meester (Gossip Girl, Date Night, The Roommate)
Theater – Cinemark Movies 12 – Ames, Iowa
Companion – Nader
Food – King Buffet
Intellectual Honesty
I like Gwyneth Paltrow. All things considered, I thought she would have had a slightly better career.
I also like it when the writer and the director are the same person. It helps me buy into the auteur theory and I really like that theory.
Baggage
I really can’t stand new country music. I grew up listening to old country music and enjoy the works of Johnny Cash, Merle Haggard, Hank Williams Sr. and Tom T. Hall (the first person I ever mention that name to and they instantly know the song Sneaky Snake – well there aren’t words for how I feel about that person). I can’t stand the warbling of any of the current country “musicians”.
I also thought that Tim McGraw was terrible in The Blind Side.
Synopsis from IMDB
A drama centered on a rising country-music songwriter (Hedlund) who sparks with a fallen star (Paltrow). Together, they mount his ascent and her comeback, which leads to romantic complications involving her husband/manager (McGraw) and a beauty queen-turned-singer (Meester).
Review
I’m not into cleverly changing the name of the movie to reflect how I feel about it. I leave that to Nader, but considering the inevitable resolution to this movie, I think the title is a misnomer. Cliche Strong would be a good name.
Cliche Strong because this movie piles one country music cliche on top of another on top of another. I understand that this happens because country music (the current incarnation) is the least interesting and least creative form of music being created today. If you write a song about your dog and a beatup pickup truck I guarantee you that it will be “rocking” karaoke nights all across Boone County, but it is as about as intellectually stimulating as paying your water bill.
It seems like this movie is meant to be the girl power version of Crazy Heart, only in the end the girl isn’t overly empowered. It follows the story of an alcoholic country musician, the only difference being the location along the career arc for the musicians. Bridges’ Bad Blake was washed up. Paltrow’s Kanter is still a big star capable of selling out arenas. Despite the fact that she fell off a stage drunk, 5 months pregnant and lost her baby.
Crazy Heart is much deeper and the music is better. Country Strong paints its emotions with a wide brush and it feels like it would be right at home on the Hallmark Channel. For you middle aged women out there, that wasn’t a compliment.
Despite Crazy Heart having better music, Country Strong is at its best when you don’t have to listen to the cliche characters struggle through cliche dialogue. It is best when they are on stage performing. I particularly enjoy the songs by Hedlund’s Hutton. The title song is kind of week, but the climatic Coming Home isn’t bad and is the best of Paltrow’s songs.
Tim McGraw doesn’t sing once in the movie, but he gives the best performance. As milquetoast as his performance is in The Blind Side, he is really good at playing a multi-layered douchebag here. He isn’t all bad, but in the end, he is a douchebag that takes his wife out of rehab too early and forces her out on a tour that her sobriety isn’t able to sustain. When she gets drunk before the first stop on the tour, he doesn’t see this as a sign that she needs to go back to rehab. He just forces the tour on, hoping to cash a bigger check in the future. Rather than spending more time with her, he spends it with Meester’s Stanton. McGraw is really good as a nonsupportive-semisupportive husband.
Nothing else really stands out in this movie, except that you’ve seen it all before. Done better.
Rating
2.5/5.0 Caramels
Buy on DVD
I won’t, but I considered buying the soundtrack until I realized they had replaced some of the songs performed by the actors in the movie with Faith Hill and Sara Evans. Not digging it record execs.
2010 Ranking
One of the most mediocre of 2010. Like Star Wars, made bearable by good music.
Bonus Information
While at True Grit the trailer for Country Strong played. Baier leaned over and proclaimed that he would seize the Man Card of anybody that attended this movie. I told him exactly when and where I would be watching this movie. He must have decided he wasn’t man enough to try to seize my Man Card, because I am still in full possession of it.
This review officially catches me up on movie reviews. In the future, I plan to use Tuesdays as a look back at my personal archives of photos. I’m going to go through every folder on my hard drive (before Photography 139) and start publishing a few out of a different folder every week. If I can stay disciplined, then I will use Wednesdays for movie reviews. Then I can officially get most of my private life out of the blog and turn to the creation of a collective blog. It is there that I hope to start a collection of fictional short stories. It is a goal any way.
RWPE Y2 #2: Long Exposure
I think the technical aspects of this theme scared off some contributors this week. Although I am excited to have a submission from Jesse who was a founding member of RWPE who quickly dropped out.
I should point out that I had some hiccups with my email system this morning. It is remotely possible that there are more submissions waiting for me when I get home, so check back later tonight to see if there were more submissions. Also don’t panic if your submission isn’t up, it will be tonight.
Here are the submissions for LONG EXPOSURE:
Jesse Howard
Christopher D. Bennett
IMAGE LOST
Julie Johnson of The Joy is in the Journey
I’ve been down to speak to the Random Theme Generator and I begged it for a less technical theme, but it just spit in my eye and then spit out the following:
PANNING CAMERA BLUR
The idea of this theme is to track a moving object with a short enough exposure so that the subject remains in focus (in the ballpark of focus), but with a long enough exposure that the background is blurred. It is a way of conveying motion in a still photograph.
A look back at last year’s PANNING CAMERA BLUR submisions:
PANNING CAMERA BLUR
Hopefully many people out there are inspired by this weeks theme. Hopefully next week I’m not in so much physical pain that I don’t screw up my email system on Monday morning.
(Very) Personal Photo Project of the Week #50
File Photo
I’ve had a goal of sending a secret to PostSecret for quite some time now. Perhaps ever since Sara introduced Jen and I to PostSecret those many years ago. It has been difficult for me because I don’t really have any secrets. It is one of the drawbacks of being an open book. So I sucked it up and sent in somebody else’s secret. Sorry Willy.
Since I can’t show the secret that I sent in, I’ll just show some of my favorite secrets over the years. Admittedly this is heavily slanted towards this week’s secrets.
Maybe I’ll mail another secret in another 4 or 5 years.
Slice of Life Vol. 32
I don’t get all jazzed up by this type of thing, but I’m sure Jesse will. I’m sure if you look hard at these pictures you will probably find me. You will probably find Jesse. You will probably find some of my other friends. Don’t ask me where. I don’t really care all that much.
These negatives were in pretty rough shape, so take these for what they are.
Youth Group Fundraiser
I did portraits as a Youth Group Fundraiser for my church about a month ago. Here are a few pictures from that night.
In unrelated religious fundraiser news, a photograph of mine will be included in a silent auction during the Sacred Heart Carnival.
I don’t really know many details about the event, besides that it will be on February 4 in Boone, I presume.
If you are around Boone on February 4 and want a chance to own a piece of my art, here is your chance. I will provide more information as more information becomes available to me.
Movie Reviews: Black Swan and The Tourist
Movie – Black Swan
Director: Darren Aronofsky (The Wrestler, The Fountain, Requiem for a Dream)
Writers: Mark Heyman, Andres Heinz, and John McLaughlin
Starring: Natalie Portman (The Professional, Garden State, The Other Boleyn Girl), Mila Kunis (Forgetting Sarah Marshall, The Book of Eli, Date Night), Vincent Cassel (Ocean’s Twelve, Eastern Promises), and Barbara Hershey (Hoosiers, Falling Down, Hannah and Her Sisters)
Theater – Cinemark Movies 12 – Ames, Iowa
Companion – Jesse and Nader
Food – Mongolian Buffet
Intellectual Honesty
I didn’t bring a ton to the table. I’ve liked Natalie Portman as an actress since The Professional, but unfortunately she slummed for awhile by making those dreadful Star Wars movies. I think she is overrated as a beauty, but I think that happens to all actresses that come to the public’s attention at a young age or is in some type of science fiction/fantasy nerd film franchise. The double whammy for Portman. So when people tell me they want to see Black Swan just because Natalie Portman is hot (Willy), I don’t get it. I think Darren Aronfsky is kind of hit and miss, but more hit. The Wrestler and Requiem for a Dream are fantastic. The Fountain is not.
Baggage
For some reason I have a prejudice against Mila Kunis. I’m not really sure why when I think about it. She is an integral part of Family Guy and Robot Chicken. Two of the greatest shows ever. She did stink it up something fierce in Book of Eli though, but I finally recently watched Forgetting Sarah Marshall and she is definitely very watchable in this movie.
Ever since I saw the first trailer for this movie I’ve thought it looked somewhat inane. However, because of the tremendous reviews and the imminent Best Picture nomination, I knew I would have to go see it. It is better after all to make preparations for the Oscar Party early rather than trying to scramble to find the nominees later.
Synopsis from IMDB
Nina (Portman) is a ballerina in a New York City ballet company whose life, like all those in her profession, is completely consumed with dance. She lives with her obsessive former ballerina mother Erica (Hershey) who exerts a suffocating control over her. When artistic director Thomas Leroy (Cassel) decides to replace prima ballerina Beth MacIntyre (Ryder) for the opening production of their new season, Swan Lake, Nina is his first choice. But Nina has competition: a new dancer, Lily (Kunis), who impresses Leroy as well. Swan Lake requires a dancer who can play both the White Swan with innocence and grace, and the Black Swan, who represents guile and sensuality. Nina fits the White Swan role perfectly but Lily is the personification of the Black Swan. As the two young dancers expand their rivalry into a twisted friendship, Nina begins to get more in touch with her dark side – a recklessness that threatens to destroy her.
Review
I should start by saying that I’m pretty sure that the working title of this film was Masturbationfest 2010! There are 4 masturbation scenes in this movie, but one of them is cleverly disguised as a lesbian sex scene. During Natalie Portman’s first masturbation scene a thought crossed my mind. All of the Star Wars fans that came to see this movie because Natalie Portman is hot, probably looked at the screen and thought, “Wait, something is backwards here.” Although surely unintentional, it is the kind of meta-joke that I can appreciate.
I have already written that I consider Portman to be overrated as a beauty, but in this movie she is so grossly thin that there are times that she is hard to look at. During her 2nd masturbation scene, I thought, “All things considered, I’d really rather watch her eat a sandwich.”
I don’t want to dwell on the masturbation, but one of my first thoughts while I watched this movie was, the reason this movie is so highly regarded by the critics is because of all the masturbation.
It has been a long held theory of mine that film critics, not to sound Puritanical, overrate movies that contain sexual deviance. I’m not saying that masturbation is sexual deviance. I’m not saying lesbian sex is sexual deviance. I’m not saying that staring at Portman on the subway and masturbating is sexual deviance, okay maybe I am saying that one is sexual deviance, but if there is a hint of sexual deviance then film critics are all over it like a dog in heat.
There is no other way for me to explain why movies like The Piano or The Crying Game are so highly regarded. There is no other way to explain the one and only movie that Roger Ebert ever wrote.
When I left the theater, my initial gut response was that I had seen the most overrated movie of 2010. This was not without reason, with about 25 minutes to go the movie had become so insipid that I was ready for it to be over. However, when it ended, the ending was so great that it kind of saved the rest of the movie for me.
That isn’t to say that the ending was a surprise. If you paid attention to Portman’s character’s relationship with her mom, I think you could figure out the ending. One of the truths of filmmaking is that you can have problems in the 1st and 2nd act, but if you wow them in the 3rd, that is all that matters.
Truth is that if this movie would have ended in any other way, I would have considered it one of the worst movies of the year. Since it ended the way that it did, it is eking into my Top 10.
What do I mean by eking? Since I’ve left the theater, I have continued to think about this movie. The more I think about it, the more I like it. The performances are great, with the exception of Winona Ryder who seems hopelessly out of place in the world of ballet. Portman and Hershey are particularly great. As is Cassel. Kunis is very serviceable.
The visual effects are stunning and the music is fantastic.
So I sit here and I think on this movie…
Rating
3.5/5 Caramels
Buy on DVD
I think I might, but I might not.
2010 Ranking
I’m going to place it barely in my Top Ten for now.
Bonus Information
This is easily the most enigmatic movie of the year for me. There is a chance that I will see this movie again this weekend with Jill. If I do, I will revisit this review briefly.
Movie – The Tourist
Director: Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck (The Lives of Others)
Writer: Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck, Christopher McQuarrie, and Julian Fellowes
Starring: Johnny Depp (Sweeney Todd, Edward Scissorhands, Pirates of the Caribbean) and Angeline Jolie (Changeling, Salt, Wanted)
Theater – Century 20 Jordan Creek – West Des Moines, Iowa
Companion – Sara
Food – BangBang Mongolian Grill
Intellectual Honesty
I really like Johnny Depp. Even when he is in absolutely terrible movies (Alice in Wonderland or Charlie and the Chocolate Factory) he is still worth watching.
Baggage
I can’t stand Angeline Jolie. Other than Girl, Interrupted; I don’t think that she has been in anything worth watching. Remember what I said about being an overrated beauty and Natalie Portman. That is Angeline Jolie times 10. That is a conservative estimate.
Synopsis from IMDB
Elise (Angelina Jolie) sits next to an American tourist, Frank (Johnny Depp), on a train going to Venice. She has chosen him as a decoy, making believe that he is her lover who is wanted for police. Not only will they need to evade the police, but also the mobster whose money her lover stole.
Review
There isn’t much to say about this movie. It isn’t really worth much of a review. I think the best way to describe it is North by Northwest for stupid people.
The surprise ending of this movie you can see almost as soon as the credits start to roll. The opening credits.
There isn’t much action. What action there is, is boring. The love story is terribly contrived. For this being a love story, there seems to be a decided lack of chemistry between Depp and Jolie. The secondary characters seem like caricatures rather than fully fleshed out characters.
Looking for a positive. Venice is beautifully photographed. I would recommend this film to the Venice Tourism Board, but to nobody else.
Rating
1.5/5 Caramels
Buy on DVD
Nope. Don’t even think I would watch it again on basic cable.
2010 Ranking
One of the worst of the year.
Bonus Information
BangBang is AWESOME! It has replaced HuHot as my favorite Mongolian Grill. There wasn’t many people in the theater, but there was a May-December couple there. Only I think it was more like a February-December couple. I thought it was a grandpa and his teenage granddaughter, until they left the theater holding hands. I don’t want to sound like a Puritan (again), but gross!
RWPE Y2 #1: Reflections
Year 2 started out with a bang! Lots of submissions! First time submitter! Welcome aboard Alicia Vermeys!
Here are the submissions for REFLECTIONS:
Christopher D. Bennett
IMAGE LOST
Alicia Vermeys
IMAGE LOST
Dawn Krause
IMAGE LOST
Julie Johnson A
IMAGE LOST
Julie Johnson B
Mike Vest
IMAGE LOST
Shannon Bardole
Dawn Poetry Submission:
Reflections
She can’t be too careful anymore,
Her memories have opened up that door.
Watching the tide bury her castle,
Wasted dreams are now just a hassle.Who she once was when she ruled the world,
That girl is gone, reality unfurled.
Demons in the people she has met,
Subdued emotion, hearts do forgetA bitter thought will eventually melt,
After all the suffering is dealt.
Time to build new castles in the sand,
Learn from the past, take time by the hand.
I’ve been to the cave that houses the new and improved Random Theme Generator. The new generator is fancy and shiny and… it doesn’t work. So I walked over to a different cave and fired up old reliable. It did not disappoint. Here is the theme for this week:
LONG EXPOSURE
This is one of the technical themes. It is hard to set a real value on what is a “long exposure”, but I would say at a minimum, the shutter speed should be longer than 1/15 of a second. I would recommend trying an exposure of at least a second, but as always, you are free to interpret the theme in whatever way you see fit.
A look back at last year’s LONG EXPOSURE submissions:
LONG EXPOSURE – 2010
Personal Photo Project of the Week #49
The Story – 2011
This is more of a year long photo project, but I’ll file it under here any way.
I have this window in my entryway/dining room that I don’t really like. During the Christmas season I use it to display Christmas cards. I’ve decided to use it to display pictures of me and my friends and family on my adventures in 2011.
One of my favorite musicians is Brandi Carlile. I saw her in concert 3 times last year. One of my favorite songs by her is The Story. That song was the inspiration for this project.
The Story
All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I’ve been
And how I got to where I am
But these stories don’t mean anything
When you’ve got no one to tell them to
It’s true…I was made for you
I climbed across the mountain tops
Swam all across the ocean blue
I crossed all the lines and I broke all the rules
But baby I broke them all for you
Because even when I was flat broke
You made me feel like a million bucks
You do
I was made for you
You see the smile that’s on my mouth
It’s hiding the words that don’t come out
And all of my friends who think that I’m blessed
They don’t know my head is a mess
No, they don’t know who I really am
And they don’t know what
I’ve been through like you do
And I was made for you…
All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I’ve been
And how I got to where I am
But these stories don’t mean anything
When you’ve got no one to tell them to
It’s true…I was made for you
These are the first pictures to be displayed in The Story Project:
Baier and I Before the Raiders Crushed the Chiefs
Baier and I Before the Raiders Humiliated the Chiefs
Sara and I Before The Tourist
I have set up a separate album in The Snapshots Gallery for The Story Project:
The Story Project
I hope to see many of you on my window this year!