So I’ve been going through some old files lately and I stumbled upon a short story that I never finished. I don’t know if I hate it or love it, but I am tempted to complete it. Here it is:
Ercamus the Warrior King Turns 30
Ercamus had traveled long on this journey. The going was arduous and he had slain many foes. He had dispatched orcs, zombies, ghouls, giants, ogres, werewolves, vampires, goblins, trolls, spiders, wraiths, skeletons, spiders, and basilisks to name only a few. His adventure was coming to an end. There were only a couple of tasks undone. It had been a year since the Dark Minotaur Mage Hermonius had enchanted his kingdom, but the dark reign would soon end. Ercamus needed only to defeat the Magenta Dragon and retrieve the Minotaur’s key. Once he was in possession of the key he could enter Hermonius’ lair and defeat him. Then he could return to his kingdom and to Decorah the woman he loved. Then he could rule his kingdom in peace and tranquility for all his remaining days.
But, first things first, Ercamus needed to defeat the Magenta Dragon. He believed this to be an easy task because he had the Blue Sword of Zanbia. It was this sword that his ancestors had used to slay dragons in the time before time. This sword was known to cause damage to dragons that lesser blades wouldn’t even scratch. To further augment his confidence, Ercamus also stocked up on wyvern’s wing at the last village. If he was nearing the end of his life force, Ercamus could use the potion to heal his wounds and continue his fight.
Ercamus entered the Magenta Dragon’s chamber and set down his torch. He reached for the hilt of the Blue Sword of Zanbia and approached his foe.
The dragon spoke, “It is you, Ercamus of Rousselot, descendant of Balzine. You should flee now. Or I shall dine on your charred remains.”
Ercamus returned in kind. “It is I Ercamus of Rousselot, descendant of Balzine. I will defeat you. I will have the Minotaur’s key.”
“Then it is time,” responded the dragon.
Ercamus chose to attack at this time. He spun and slashed at the dragon’s flank. There was a spray of blood as “Old Bluey” cut into the dragon. The Magenta Dragon swiped at Ercamus. The dragon’s claws stuck with tremendous force, but Ercamus’ titanium armor withstood the blow. Ercamus struck back. It was only a glancing blow. The dragon sustained a mere 15 hit points of damage. The dragon pulled back and belted out an intense stream of fire that caused 35 hit points of damage to Ercamus.
It was Ercamus’ turn. He decided to use a spell, as he was fully loaded with magic points. He thought that an ice spell that he had learned in the village of Ferox would do the trick. In his experience it had been quite destructive to green and goldenrod dragons. Often killing them with only one incantation. He hoped that all dragons would be susceptible to the spell regardless of their place on the color spectrum.
Ercamus bowed down and began chanting the spell, but before its conclusion all the light in his world went out. In an instant he feared that he was dead. In the next instant there was no fear. His world no longer existed.
“Shit!” Ray screamed at the television. He was angry. He contemplated flipping off the television, but as that thought crossed his mind another one darted from the other side and his anger was replaced with fear. What if he had to start back from the village of Skoa? He hadn’t saved the game since he visited the Inn of Skoa well over an hour ago. He had lost a full hour of Minotaurquest VII! Sure he could play the game over, but this was his chance to defeat the game before his friend Black Knight had. Last time he chatted with Black Knight his warrior was only to the 25th level and just found the emerald armor. If he could complete the game first it would be the first time he had beat Black Knight since Minotaurquest III. He would be the warrior king of the chat room again.
It was then that it occurred to Ray that he had lost power. Perhaps, it was only that a circuit breaker had been blown. He knew he was running quite a few electronics on one breaker, but to really enjoy Minotaurquest you need to have the stereo running so you could slice and dice wraiths in surround sound. Perhaps, the stereo sending power to his sub was just too much for the house’s electrical system.
Ray pulled himself up out of his gaming chair and walked across the family room towards the utility room where the circuit box was housed. Ray muttered his way across the two rooms, grabbing a flashlight off a shelf in mid stride. A move that wouldn’t have impressed most people, but Ray took a second from his frustration to admire his hand eye coordination.
It was really wishful thinking on Ray’s part. It was mid-February in the Midwest and an ice storm had been soaking Ray’s town for a couple hours. A downed power line half a mile a way had disabled power for the south side of town. Ray didn’t know that, but he did know that none of the circuits were broken as he slammed the door shut.
Ray was near a panic now. Black Knight lived in California. He surely had power. He could be slaying the Magenta Dragon right now. Ray knew that this was bullshit. Exquisite bullshit! It was his dad’s fault. Ray knew this one fact. If the old man had bought a power generator then he could make his way to the garage this instant and fire it up. This was the exact reason why people had power generators. What was he going to do now?
At this exact moment it struck Ray. What was he going to do now? He couldn’t play Minotaurquest. He couldn’t watch television. He couldn’t watch a DVD. He couldn’t watch a video. He couldn’t listen to music. He couldn’t surf the Internet. There didn’t seem to be many options. He didn’t want to read by flashlight. That might hurt his eyes. He could light candles, but if he spilt wax on one of his novels, then their value would be down the toilet. He could go upstairs and try to talk to somebody in his family, but his younger sister was at college and he couldn’t stomach talking to his dad. It was his idea to move where the weather was so bad. That old man didn’t even consider getting a generator.
Truth be known, Ray never considered getting a backup generator before his quest was ended so abruptly. However, he made a mental note that when he got his own place, there would be a backup power supply. This would not happen to him again.
Ray slouched back into his gaming chair. He noticed there was a tear on the bottom side of the cup holder. He made another note. Buy new camping chair. Ray shut off the flashlight and sat in the darkness with a smile on his face. Camping chair? Why would anybody go camping? Nothing to do out there. Then he realized he was in the same predicament as campers. He had nothing to do. The smug look disappeared in the darkness.
Ray decided to light candles. His mother had decorated the family room with scented candles in seemingly every nook and cranny. It took only moments and the room was illuminated a small bit. Ray sat back down.
Now what? Boredom. It was his nemesis again. He thought briefly about masturbating. It was something he enjoyed and it would fill up some time. Maybe the power would come back on while he was finishing up. However, he didn’t seem to be in the mood even though it had been a couple days since he had given himself a tug. If he wasn’t in the mood he just couldn’t make himself be in the mood. Besides all his best pornography was locked up inside his computer. Access denied. His thoughts glanced to the lingerie catalog, but then he remembered that his sister had taken it to college with her. It occurred to him that once when he was in a bind like this he had used a Wal-Mart ad. Julie, associate; had done the trick for him on that night. It didn’t matter. Julie wouldn’t help him tonight. He wasn’t in the mood.
He looked down at himself. “Sorry love, I got a headache tonight,” he said to nobody in particular. Then he chuckled at his cleverness.
Then his thoughts escaped his control. He thought about his girlfriend. She wasn’t his current girlfriend. She was the only girlfriend he had ever had. So he was still correct to think of her as his girlfriend, damn the tenses.
Her name was Samantha. He wished she were with him tonight. Strangely enough, not just because of the sex stuff. He just kind of wished she were hanging around. He had realized awhile back that he had probably been to blame for things going wrong.
There relationship had been going well. They were having sex regularly, so it was going well in Ray’s eyes. Then one night she asked him about sexual fantasies. He said that he had always wanted to “make it” with a nurse.
The next night his parents were out of town she came over. She let herself into the guest bathroom. Ray continued watching some anime program. When she came out of the bathroom, she tried to get Ray’s attention. His gaze was glued to the television. She strutted back and forth behind the couch. Ray never moved. Finally she smacked the back of his head.
Ray was instantly annoyed by this gesture. His sisters had done this to him several times during their childhood. He turned in anger and then his jaw dropped open.
“Do you like?” Samantha asked.
“What are you doing?” was the answer.
“You said you always wanted to make it with a nurse.”
“I said I wanted to fuck a nurse, not fuck you dressed like a nurse.”
Where did she get such a crazy idea? It was beyond him. He turned back to his program. She walked back into the bathroom, gathered her belongings and left. She never returned. Ray didn’t follow her. The television was too good.
His mom wanted her back. She was privately concerned that Ray would never marry. She also knew that most 27 year olds living in their parents’ basement didn’t attract to many girls. She advised Ray to try to make amends for whatever he had done wrong. Ray assured her that he had done nothing wrong.
Ray did consider doing the flowers, apology, and groveling bit, but that weekend there was a sci-fi convention in town. Then on that Monday he had to reorganize his comics. On Tuesday new movies and music came out. By Wednesday he lost his steam. It was the curse of living such a full life.
THAT IS ALL THAT EXISTS TO DATE. MOST LIKELY IT IS ALL THAT WILL EVER EXIST.
