Category Archives: Black & White

Earth’s Laughter

The earth laughs in flowers.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

The great thing about flowers is that we can all agree that earth truly does laugh in flowers even if we can’t agree on whether or not the earth is flat or a globe or even pear shaped.

Last year, I think I got away from flower photos a little bit. I’m not entirely sure why other than maybe it was because I might have felt that I was starting to become self-referential with my flower photography.

Nah. That probably isn’t it.

I do know that I have yet to take hardly any flower pictures this year either. That doesn’t mean I didn’t take any flower pictures last year. In fact, I was commission by a relative of mine (a cousin somewhere on my Mom’s side) to photograph her extensive flower garden. So I did, but I never shared the photos.

So here is just the beginning of a ton of flower pictures from Donna Jones’ flower garden. This collection consists of petunias and lilies. If you don’t know which is which don’t be afraid to ask, for my way of mocking you will be very gentle.


Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

Donna Jones' Flowers

There are plenty more of Donna’s flowers in the on-deck circle taking their practice swings. Checking out to make sure they have the proper amount of pine tar on their bats. Stretching their bat swinging muscles. You’ll get to see if they have what it takes to go yard very soon.

Congratulations Saydie – Beta

It is time for lap 2 in the Congratulations Saydie marathon. But before we get into the photo bonanza, I want to take a small quick time to take umbrage with one of the responses I received to the last batch of Saydie images. They pulled out the part of the entry where I referred to Saydie as my niece and held it up to mockery, since we share not a scrap of DNA or would share part of a family tree through marriage.

This person feels that the only nieces and nephews I have are my biological nieces in nephews and the children of Olivia’s brother and sisters.

My reaction to their commentary is just pure sadness. I hope they don’t go through life with this stilted definition of the word “family”.

The New York Times ran an articles and asked high school students to define family. I just want to share two:

Caitlin

I do not think there is such thing as a “normal family” because everyone’s lifestyle is different, and it would be a stereotype to say that all normal families have a Mom, a Dad and kids or a pet. That is not true. Some people choose a different choice. There are kids with two moms, or two dads, and with one mom or one dad. There are also plenty of kids who live with a close relative as well. Family are the people you feel safe and secure with. Everyone’s family is normal to them, because that is how they live their life. So be proud of your family, and don’t classify one family as normal.

AND

Taylor

I define a family as a group of people who share laughter, sadness, tragedy, victory, loss, regret, happiness, and success together. A family is hard to define. Most commonly one thinks a man, a woman, and their children. Time has shown this isn’t an exact answer. Grandparents, adopted parents, cousins, aunts, uncles, and even just friends can make up a family. Family is important for individuals to lead happy lifestyles and to become satisfied with their life.

I just hope that the commentator opens their heart some day. Maybe if they owned a dog…

Here are a ton more pictures of my niece Saydie:


Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

Saydie Howard - Senior Pictures

There will be a ton more pictures from Saydie’s senior pictures photo shoot in the coming weeks!

05-10-08 – A Tale of Gypsum Junk

The pictures in today’s collection come from the folder 05-10-08.

These pictures came from a road trip to Fort Dodge I went on with Jason Baier. A road trip that ended with us coming face to face with a gypsum penis. What is more, that was the ultimate goal of the road trip.

This journey started when I was reading a magazine on the greatest hoaxes in history. One of the hoaxes was the Cardiff Giant. I’m not going to go into an incredible amount of detail, but what is important to know is that the gypsum that made up the Cardiff Giant came from Fort Dodge. It was purchased in Fort Dodge. Loaded on a train in Boone. Shipped to Chicago. Carved in Chicago. Then buried and dug up in a farm near Cardiff, New York.

The original Cardiff Giant is in a museum in Cooperstown, New York. A replica is in Fort Dodge. A pale and pathetic copy is housed at Living History Farms. The Living History Farms Giant is more modest than the original Giant. He covers his gypsum junk with his hands. The Fort Dodge Giant and the original just leaves it out there, blowing in the wind.

Some of the pictures below have never been made public before because Baier and I very flagrantly broke some museum rules. I hesitate to publish these photos because he is now a big time white collar criminal with infinite PTO and numerous minions. I would hate for our youthful indiscretions come back to haunt a man of his stature. However, I’ve done no research to back this up, I think the statue of limitations on our museum crimes has passed. I think he will be safe.

Here are some pictures of our trip to Fort Dodge to meet the Cardiff Giant and his gypsum junk:


Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant Road Trip

Cardiff Giant Road Trip

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant Road Trip

Cardiff Giant Road Trip

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

Cardiff Giant - Fort Dodge

I learned the hard way that not all people consider glorious pictures of gypsum junk to be appropriate. Back when I was using Photobucket to store my blog images, pictures of The Cardiff Giant that showed him in his full glory were flagged and then taken down. I can feel only pity for people that can’t appreciate great art.

I replaced the images that showed images with his anatomy with pictures like this:


Cardiff Giant Road Trip

Yeah. Lame.

What isn’t lame is that by adding these pictures to the Photography 139 Photo Gallery I was able to restore the following historical “An Artist’s Notebook” posts to their original glory:

LESSONS LEARNED IN A GIANT’S TOWN

TOO HOT FOR PHOTOBUCKET

There are more pictures from the Cardiff Giant Road Trip that I didn’t share here. You can see them by clicking on the link below:

THE CARDIFF GIANT ROAD TRIP

Next Saturday’s walk down memory lane will involve Little White Lye Soap… I know… but this time action photos… and Mother’s Day.

Custer State Park Vol. 3

This is the final collection of pictures from Custer State Park in South Dakota. In fact, I’ve almost come to the end of the pictures from my trip to South Dakota with my Mom. The only ones left to curate and edit are the pictures from Mount Rushmore.

Even though Custer State Park didn’t quite live up to the hype, I would definitely visit it again. If for no other reason than to visit my feral donkey friends.

So without further adieu, I present the last of the Custer State Park pictures:


Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

Custer State Park

I’ll probably start unveiling the Mount Rushmore pictures in the near future!

05-09-08: The Big Jesus Road Trip

The photos from today’s blog come from the folder 05-09-08.

These pictures were taken during what historians have called THE BIG JESUS ROAD TRIP. It is hard to believe that 10 years have passed since THE BIG JESUS ROAD TRIP, but they have.

Jesse and I embarked on THE BIG JESUS ROAD TRIP with a destination in mind (Big Jesus) and a few stops in mind to make along the way. We wanted to see the place where “The Music Died”. We wanted to see the World’s Largest Cheeto. We wanted to stop at Bob’s Drive-Inn and try a Bob’s Dog. Anything else we experienced on the trip was gravy. Delicious gravy. The type you put in a gravy pitcher during Thanksgiving.

Mmmmmm…. gravy!


The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The Big Jesus Road Trip

The World’s Largest Cheeto did not disappoint. Neither did Big Jesus or the Bob’s Dog. The Pocahontas statue… yeah. That is one ugly statue.

Sometime this year I hope to make a trip to see the world’s largest popcorn ball. Who is game?

By adding THE BIG JESUS ROAD TRIP photos to the Photography 139 Photo Gallery, I was able to restore the following historical “An Artist’s Notebook” post to its original glory:

THE BIG JESUS

There are more pictures from THE BIG JESUS ROAD TRIP that I didn’t share in this blog post. If you want to take a gander at those, click on the link below:

THE BIG JESUS ROAD TRIP PHOTO GALLERY

Next Saturday’s trip down memory lane will involve a trip to visit the Cardiff Giant and his giant phallus. Jason Baier will be joining us!

Congratulations Saydie – Alpha

I’d just like to wish a full and hearty congratulations to all the Class of 2018 on their recent accomplishment of graduating from high school.

I obviously don’t have any wise words about their future, but I can Google and find somebody that something wise once with the best of them!

“But my dear graduates, let me be frank, the best years are very much ahead of you. And they can be whatever you want them to be… As much as you’ve changed during your time here, more change is coming. You’re going to continue to evolve in unforeseen ways. You are full of complexities and wonders that haven’t even begun to surface. Life’s unpredictability will draw these out and what defines you now will be mere shades and hues of a more vibrant you over the next five, 10, 50 years. Honestly, I can’t think of anything more liberating than that, knowing that life will look differently than you think it will.”
– Octavia Spencer

But if there is one person whose accomplishments I most want to lift up and whose future adventures I’m most interested in now that her high school career as come to an end, it is my niece Saydie.

I celebrate Saydie’s accomlishments and look to her future by sharing some (a ton) of pictures from her Senior Picture Photo Shoot from last summer:


Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

Saydie Howard

You may recall my fondness for pictures that aren’t posed. Yes, those are my favorites in this collection and every collection.

Don’t worry, there are plenty of other Saydie pictures coming in the coming weeks. We aren’t even warmed up. We are warming up to get warmed up!

You Know I’ll Leave ‘Em Changing; ‘Cause You Know I’m Real with It; Don’t Care if You Feeling It!

The world wasn’t ready for these alternate TOY images on Monday. Most of these pictures are taken in the Photography 139 Backyard Studio where photography was often disturbed by 2 raucous dogs that had a whole yard to play in, but seemed to want to only play right on top of my rubber dinosaurs.

The flower image is from one of my Mom’s flower pots. It was taken with the TOY special effects setting on the trusty old Alpha 77ii.

However, the images that really might make you stand up and go “Huh?” are of the ginorumous smoker.

The smoker is the new smoker for Baby Got Rack. It was purchased in Louisville from another award winning barbecue man and shipped all the way up to Iowa. Many people have asked when will be their next opportunity to try some award winning Baby Got Rack barbecue.

You could try crashing a Catholic anniversary party in a few weeks.

Otherwise, the only competition that Baby Got Rack is currently eyeing is the Farm Bureau contest at the Boone County Fair.

Other than that, you’ll have to wait for my birthday extravaganza in 2019. I’m guaranteeing that it will happen again in 2019. I just have to settle on a theme. I’m thinking the theme might be “Jorts & Cargo Shorts”. That way the invitations will be easy to make.

Next year my birthday is on a Saturday, so I can actually hold the shindig on my birthday. It would be perfect timing. You can go to your favorite graduate’s open house and then come sit around to the fire tub and listen to KNMA Radio – The Power Retriever.

We’ll see.

Okay, I can’t hold the TOY alternates back any longer:


Toy - Alternate

Toy - Alternate

Toy - Alternate

Toy - Alternate

Toy - Alternate

Toy - Alternate

Toy - Alternate

Toy - Alternate

Toy - Alternate

Toy - Alternate

Toy - Alternate

Toy - Alternate

Toy - Alternate

Toy - Alternate

Toy - Alternate

You’re welcome world!

Badlands Vol. 5

The final set of pictures from my brief sojourn through the Badlands with my Mom:


The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

The Badlands

That is it. That is the last of the Badlands pictures. Still have plenty of pictures from my trip to South Dakota to publish though. I’ll get through them all, some day.

+++++++++++++++

Actually that isn’t it. I’d like to thank everybody that wished me a happy birthday on Friday.

I believe this to be the entire list:

-Mom
-Jesse
-Michelle
-Teresa
-Dawn
-Nate
-Bethany
-Logan
-Shannon
-Becca
-Sara Lockner
-Stephanie
-Sarah Karber
-Colleen
-Micky
-Laura
-Aunt Linda
-Jay
-Faust
-Monica
-Andree
-Becky

Thanks for all the birthday wishes. It was a perfectly adequate birthday. I didn’t go to work. I got to do some tenderloining. I took some pictures. I hung out with my favorite dog in the world and one of my other favorite dogs in the world. I also watched ROAD HOUSE.

The movie that perfected throat ripping and had so many great lines like:

You know, I heard you had balls big enough to come in a dump truck, but you don’t look like much to me.

You’re too stupid to have a good time.

Take the biggest guy in the world, shatter his knee and he’ll drop like a stone.

I got married to an ugly woman. Don’t ever do that. It just takes the energy right out of you. She left me, though. Found somebody even uglier than she was. That’s life. Who can explain it?

Calling me sir is like putting an elevator in an outhouse. It don’t belong.

That gal’s got entirely too many brains to have an ass like that.

This place has a sign hangin’ over the urinal that says, “Don’t eat the big white mint”.

And of course

Pain don’t hurt.

If you missed your chance to celebrate my birth, you have one more chance. Next Sunday night is the Union Street Theater’s monthly movie night. Here are the movies for the double feature:


Movie Night

I chose the movies this month (instead of the usual committee that picks the movies) since it is my birth month. If you are wondering why I picked KING KONG VS. GODZILLA, then do you really know me at all.

I picked REAR WINDOW because I love that movie, it is directed by Hitchcock, it is about a photographer, the photographer is dating Grace Kelly, and it is is the best movie ever made about a photographer.

A close second is BLOW-UP. Right Jay and Jesse?

Projector rolls at 6 PM. I’m not sure if there will be any special treats for that night. We’ll see.

05-07-08

The images below come from the folder 05-07-08. The images range from a post supper photo shoot with an Ungs to pictures of painting Monica’s one-time Roland home to me showing off a fat stack of cash to some flowers from my Mom’s flowerbeds to one of the most fascinating creatures on the planet.


05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

05-07-08

By adding these images to the Photography 139 Photo Gallery I was able to restore these historic “An Artist’s Notebook” entries to their original glory:

TELL MY FRIEND WILLIE BROWN

SOME STORM

SUPPER WITH THE UNGS

FALSE SNAKE HYPE

That sick wad of cash that I was flashing in the Fazoli’s parking lot was my winnings from my bowling league. Helping Monica paint the Roland house was Suzie and Cassie.

Next Saturday’s walk down memory lane will be all about the Big Jesus Road Trip.